review – Page 9 – Fare..Eat..Ales

Review:Toronto:Ossington:Delux

June 8, 2013 spennyrdLeave a comment

I was driving down Ossington looking for a lunch spot and noticed a sandwich board advertising a Cuban lunch. Intrigued, I parked and dropped in for lunch at Delux, which focuses on this side of the Atlantic during the day as a deviation from the French-inspired dinner service at night.I was quickly seated and found som irony in the fact that I was seated facing a wall size pictur of the alphabet in a plac that can’t spell th word Delux.

A menu offering on a clipboard was provided to me quickly.

Bottles of water served Ossington-style* were readily available.

Conch fritters were ordered as an appetizer. They were very good and served piping hot.

Dessert was not an option since I got the bill before I was even asked if I wanted any.

Expensive cocktails….$14 for a 2 oz mojito?

Fried ripe plantains were spiced nicely but were oversalted.

Guava juice for $3 was a refreshing option.

Ham on the cubano was abundant.

Indigestion ensued.

Jalapenos were served with the Cuban to spice it up.

Kicking myself for not ordering the rice and beans.

Lackluster dipping sauce served with conch fritters.

Mustard on the cubano was delicious and not overbearing.

Nice amount of melted swiss on the cubano sandwich. Served at a great temperature.

Oysters are available for a bit over two bucks each.

Pressed cubano sandwich was quite good but not remarkable.

Questionable service. She made no suggestions, was slow and somewhat apathetic.

Roast pork on the cubano was moist and delicious.

Salads looked good. They were ordered by other tables.

Takes credit card! Woohoo!

Underwhelming decor.

Vegetarian choices include avocado, cheese and tomato sandwiches as well as salads and sides.

Wine list focuses primarily on Canadian and French with a few US, Spanish and Italian choices thrown in.

X is not the last letter in Deluxe.

You might want to share the conch fritters. There are too many and they are too rich for one person.

Zagat ranking of 23 for food. Lower for service and decor.

*-Ossington-Style water service usually involves a continuous supply of tap or still water served in some sort of glass vessel or carafe.

My Take

I must admit I was a bit let down after raising my hopes with the thought of an exotic Cuban lunch. The food was authentic enough but the service made me feel like I was JFK in a Cuban restaurant during the Bay of Pigs invasion.

This experience may have been an anomaly from a place which normally promises a favourable dining experience, but for now the absent E in Delux may represent “excellence” because it was definitely missing on this particular day.

Review:DDD:Baltimore:Sip and Bite

May 24, 2013April 20, 2014 spennyrdLeave a comment

This is a lazy one. I wrote this review on Yelp! last summer and I’m doing a cut and paste with a few additions.

Sip & Bite is a true diner located in the vicinity of downtown Baltimore since 1948. It has evolved into an iconic joint which now ships it’s crab cakes, mugs and T-shirts nationwide.

When I entered, the first thing I saw were three or four cooks busy on the grill cooking eggs, breakfast meats and potatoes. It was a divine sight. They had a synchronicity reminiscent of a team event at the Olympic games.

Although I didn’t meet the owner, I met Deena, one of the waitresses and she was terrific. When I ordered the DDD platter, ( famous crab cake and spanakopita) she told me to order the Greek salad and not the sides since the intense flavours of the sides would interfere with the crab cake. I smiled, nodded and agreed. She was right. The greek salad had the best feta I have ever tasted. Deena proudly told me it was barrel-aged imported feta and I believed her. The crab cake was amazing…great texture, great taste and a great commitment to the crab and not breadcrumbs or other fillers. The spanakopita was good as well. It was full of spinach flavours and tasted fresh. The pastry was a tad too crispy.

Between greeting regulars and telling me stories of defunct GPS units, I thoroughly enjoyed my experience with Deena at the helm.

Speaking of old fashioned service, Sofia, the owner, responded my yelp post with the following:

Thank you for taking the time to write us such an excellent review! Dina really is terrific, she has so many regular customers coming in for her its insane!! Very glad you enjoyed everything, please stop in again whenever you are in town, and hopefully this time we can have the pleasure of meeting! Enjoy the rest of your summer!

My Take

Sip and Bite has been around this long because they care about the right things, the food and the service. It is welcoming from the minute you walk to the minute you leave. It’s not phony or staged or deliberate. It just is. As I said on yelp, I would return here in a second. No blackboard menus or plaid-wearing abecrombie models serving you. Just old-fashioned food with old fashioned service.

If i an offer one line of advice…. Ask if Deena is in (I’m hoping she is) and order a crab cake. If you do, you will give this dive a five……

Verdict: 5 Guyz

Check out my overall DDD List at https://fareeatales.wordpress.com/2012/12/22/diners-drives-ins-and-divesthe-list/

Review:Toronto:Airport:Boccone Trattoria Veloce

May 24, 2013 spennyrd1 Comment

The mustache is a noble feature. Some of the most famous and notorious people in history including Charlie Chaplin, Adolf Hitler, Tom Selleck and even Nintendo’s Mario have all been somewhat defined by their mustache. They are a trend right now, appearing on everything from girl’s sweaters to keychains to taxis (yes there is a cab company called Mustache rides in Indianapolis). The mustache has even become the focal point of Movember, when men who have no business growing facial hair can get away with it for a month a year.

The Toronto culinary scene has it’s own famous mustache; celebrity chef Massimo Copra. Fifteen years ago he opened Mistura which redefined Italian food in Toronto. He has taken his innovation beyond facial hair and has expanded into one of the most under serviced areas in the restaurant business…the airport.

Historically, Toronto airport fare could best be defined as mass-produced, overpriced, cafeteria food which needs to be cut with dull utensils. More recently, popular chain restaurants such as Weber’s and Casey’s have emerged as alternate and slightly better choices. As of 2013, Chef Copra has raised the bar by opening Boccone, the first in what promises to be a slew of celebrity chef inspired restaurants in what should be a perfect dining market; travelers with expense accounts and good taste contained in a glass bubble with time to kill. Even if there isn’t a lot of time, Baccone offers a 10-minute guarantee to ensure one doesn’t miss their flight or has time for a pre-flight manicure.

Located in terminal one, Baccone is a modest eatery offering an array of standard Italian foods including pizza, pasta and sandwiches. A gluten free menu is featured predominately at the entrance featuring things like corn pasta.

They also have a mid-size drink list which offers a few classics. I opted for a Baccone’s Blood Orange gin cocktail for a reasonable $10. It was a refreshing, somewhat sophisticated drink but with an orange garnish the size of the glass it managed to maintain a bit of the cheesiness of an old school airport cocktail.

I decided on pasta for lunch and ordered the $16 Gamberetti spaghetti; a simple olive oil based dish with shrimp, tomato and zucchini. As promised, the dish came out in the 10th minute and was served hot. The pasta was a perfect al dente, the large shrimp were cooked to maintain their moistness and was seasoned well. The “airport” in this dish was the grated Parmesan served in a white, ribbed ramekin…classic.

Unable to pass on dessert, I was torn between a half dozen classic offerings. I settled for the frittelle, an Italian style donut served with chocolate and whipped cream. Eight glazed timbit sized morsels arrived warm and served in a newspaper-like liner. Three were plenty because they were sweeter than a purring kitten wearing a gondolier hat while paddling through the canals of Venice. The chocolate and whipped cream intensified the sweetness. I’m glad I ordered a coffee as well since the bitterness was able to create a bit of a balance.

My Take

The stash has made a splash with the opening of a high quality restaurant in the normally mundane airport market. The decor is bright and fun and the variety of the food is great, including a modest list of gluten free options. The friendly service was prompt and they kept to the 10 minute promise. This is an ideal stop for the traveler searching for quick and decent food that stays within the expense budget.

Although I did see him buzzing around the restaurant, I didn’t get a chance to speak to Massimo himself…nor did I get a picture. If anything, at the advice of my son, I was dying to say to him “I mustache you a question…..” . Sigh…I guess I’ll have to shave it for later.

DDD:San Diego:Blue Water Seafood Market and Grill

May 23, 2013 spennyrdLeave a comment

I’m a sucker for a good gimmick, especially if it’s done right. I’m not talking being served by a pirate or a creepy clown making balloon animals for whiny kids. I’m talking a good, simple concept that defines a restaurant, one that draws people in from miles away.

The Blue Water Seafood Market Grill fits the bill. It’s easy the longest wait I have had at any Triple D, even though I went around 4 pm. I had a 5 or 10 minute outside, standing behind two old ladies (who reminded me of the female version of Statler and Waldorf from the muppet show) bitching about the number of people since “that man from that show came”. I nodded in agreement and looked to the sky while whistling in hopes that my pasty white complexion wouldn’t give me away.

Once inside, I realized I was still in for a wait which in the end was a bit shy of an hour. During this hour, a number of cool and/or amusing things happened:

1. I continued to be exposed to the banter of the local gossip club talking about everything from annoying tourists to the destruction of the San Diego water front.

2. I was able to choose from any of the numerous cuts of beautiful, fresh fish cooked in a your choice marinade and served on a sandwich, salad, plate or taco. The pacific halibut was calling my name so I had it thrown on a salad.

3. I was offered a local craft beer for a few bucks in line while I waited (which I believe lead to a stunk-eye or two from the Waldorf). There is something liberating about sucking back a pint under the watchful eye of a swordfish.

4. I enjoyed watching people trying to violate the “you can’t sit until you get your food” policy. Staff patrol the grounds like parking attendants looking for violators. If necessary, they will make a scene similar to that of an embarrassing “Happy Birthday” serenade. It seems like a stupid policy until I paid, turned around and… like clockwork; a window seat magically appeared…and it was nowhere near the muppets.

The line — The Line (I wouldn’t dare snap Statler and Waldorf)

For some reason, I’m missing the picture of the halibut itself but the freshness of the fish and the care in preparation was evident. It was perfectly cooked and a good portion size for the price.

They stick to what they do best…fish. A dozen oysters for $15? Shrimp Ceviche for $5.25 (with El Indio chips from next door)? A bowl of clam chowder for $4? Even today (I went a couple of years ago), the menu still offers fresh fish at great prices.

Here’s a Statler and Waldorf quote which I think is quite relevant in this context.

Statler: [Up in the balcony, Statler and Waldorf make fun of Pepe’s bad jokes] Hey, the shrimp’s floundering!
[Statler and Waldorf both laugh]
Pepe the Prawn: You shut-up okay?
Statler: He told us to clam up!
Waldorf: What’s he want to do? Mussle us?
[Both laugh again]
Pepe the Prawn: Don’t get me steamed okay!
Statler: Steamed shrimp!
Waldorf: Oh, pass the cocktail sauce!
[Both laugh]
Pepe the Prawn: That’s it. I’m coming up there!
[Leaves the stage to go to the balcony]
Statler: Whoooaaa… I’m shaking!
Waldorf: You’re always shaking.
[He laughs and Statler grumbles]

In the end, like the muppets, Blue Water is a gimmick that works. If you have an hour to kill, don’t see it as a long line but instead as an experience and enjoy; the fish is well worth the wait.

Verdict: 5 Guys

DDD:Vancouver:Tomahawk BBQ

May 14, 2013May 14, 2013 spennyrd1 Comment

Driving down a highway, I see deer jumping, wild turkeys frolicking in farmer’s field’s and large billboards features perfectly constructed burgers which are attractively stacked like luxury seafront condos. Succumbing to temptation, I will on occasion pull over and roll the dice on the possibility that some burger, somewhere will even slightly resemble the imagery posted roadside. Instead, I feel like William D-FENS Foster (played by Michael Douglas in the 1993 movie Falling Down) in the fictional Whammy Burger:

“See, this is what I’m talkin’ about. Turn around. Look at that. Do you see what I mean. It’s, it’s plump, it’s juicy, it’s three inches thick. Now, look at this sorry, miserable, squashed thing. Can anybody tell me what’s wrong with this picture? Anybody? Anybody at all.”

The only difference is I’m not carrying a gun or wearing a short sleeve shirt and tie.

I had expected to be fooled by the propaganda of Tomahawk BBQ, which has been featured on both Diners, Drive-ins and Dives and You Gotta Eat Here. Around since the 20’s, it promises meat as organic and the leaping deer themselves. It features big breakfasts and great burgers. After what was a hellish cab ride over the wrong Vancouver bridge, I arrived and was seated at the bar (picture an old school diner with round stools and formica counters). I turned around to see two gents eating a breakfast (which I later determined to be the mixed grill-Nine generous slices of Yukon style bacon, two country fresh eggs, fried or scrambled, two slices of Klondike toast, organic hamburger patty, aged cheddar cheese, wiener, onions and fresh sautéed mushrooms) served on a plate the size of a hubcap. Despite this temptation, I had to have a burger.

It was difficult choosing from the 15 choices, but I settled on the Skookum Chief Burger (Onions, lettuce, organic ground beef patty, Yukon bacon, egg, aged cheddar cheese, wiener, tomato, and Tomahawk special sauce). I prepared myself for internal rage as I patiently waited for the arrival of another substandard burger. I was, however, occupied by the “It’s B.C For Me” fact-filled placemat complete with sketches of Canadian legends, facts and stories including bears, igloos and whales living in Hudson bay.

The burger arrived as a tower of truth. Each ingredient was evident and identifiable. Even the minor details, from the toasting of the homemade bun to the angles of the cheese to the liberal yet not overabundant use of sauce, made this a billboard burger which ended up tasting exactly like it looked.

Insanity dictated dessert, so I opted for banana cream pie. Was it as good as it looked? Pretty damn close.

The food lives up to the legend. The decor is a mix of aboriginal artifacts, a candy shop and mildly cheesy souvenir store. The service, at least the day I was there, was exactly what I expected; they weren’t wearing suits and shining bar glasses with sheepskin bar cloths but instead they were hard working people whose moods mirror the people sitting in front of them. I like sincere service in whatever form it comes in…just ask William D-FENS Foster:

“Why am I calling you by your first names? I don’t even know you. I still call my boss “Mister”, and I’ve been working for him for seven years, but all of a sudden I walk in here and I’m calling you Rick and Sheila like we’re in some kind of AA meeting… I don’t want to be your buddy, Rick. I just want some breakfast”.

Verdict: 5 Guyz

Review:Toronto:The Annex:Harbord Room

May 10, 2013May 11, 2013 spennyrdLeave a comment

I’ve had a few celebrity sightings in life. I remember seeing famed baseball pitcher Denis Martinez in a café after a Red Sox game back in the mid 90’s. I rode 7 floors on an elevator with Alicia Silverstone and her dog in Toronto hotel circa 2004.

Nothing, however, makes me as excited as meeting anybody who has anything to do with the food industry. I have had run-ins with icons Lynn Crawford and Mark McEwan. I’ve met top chef participants Jonathan Korecki, Carl Heinrich and Connie DeSousa through visits to their restaurants.

Needless to say I was quite excited to meet Kevin Brauch during a recent visit to Harbord Room, a well established restaurant making good burgers and high end cocktails before burgers and high end cocktails were so cool. He came in toward the end of my Monday night meal and we had a chance to chat all things food, drink, Alton Brown and Iron Chef. Let me put it into perspective… I’d rather meet a guy who had built his career drinking all over the world and managing the egos of the likes of Bobby Flay than let’s say, Tom Cruise, whose definition of acting is trying to convince us that he could street fight guys half his age and twice his height.

Must

Harbord room had a cool burger before having cool burgers was cool. Erring on the side of simplicity, it’s as well known as Mario Batali’s orange crocs and the burger praises are ubiquitous in every critic and blogger review. It’s a gem from the bun to the perfectly cooked beef to the fries.

The whitefish ceviche was a blackboard special that was fresh and clean with perfect tones of heat and acidity and a Morimotoish delicacy.

As charcuterie crests in popularity across the GTA, Harbord room keeps up with the times with a board full of carnivorous treats ranging from venison pepperoni to an airy chicken liver pate to a pleasant terrine that would make Marc Forgione’s hair stand on end (ok..bad example). There were house pickles, great crostini, homemade preserves and a fried egg round it all off.

Harbord room has also stayed current in the world of cocktails, likely in part to the fact about a third of the restaurant is taken up by the bar. High end liquors highlight a diverse drink menu which can get rather pricy. I indulged in “Liquid Swords”, a complex meczal based multi-ingredient drink with an execution as meticulous and passionate as a Michael Symon lamb chop.

Consideration toward a good side is like paying homage to a good sous chef. Let’s call the rapini the Anne Burell of sides. Bitter rapini, salty almonds, hot chili and sweet sultanas only make sense as it appeals to all senses.

Maybe

There was a bit of Cornish hen controversy as our table was told it was not available due to a lack of greens. We asked for it anyway only to find out that it hadn’t been brined for the appropriate amount of time but they would serve it anyway. Despite the lack of bath time, the poultry was delicious and moist. If anything the sausage, the only thing on the plate not involved in the controversy, was as lackluster as an Iron Chef trying to make dessert.

I enjoy olive oil cake and I like Harbord’s spin. Priced in the single digits, it hit all the elements of a good dessert. The citrus and chocolate sides provided some variety to the neutral cake. The almond crunch added some needed texture.

Olive Oil Cake with Custard, Sorbet and Crunch

Mundane

Let’s call this a relative mundane list. Nothing at Harbord was bad per se, but the strength of the menu made some of the dessert seem a bit substandard. The Valrhona Dark Chocolate & Smoked Banana Terrine, Salted Caramel, Peanut Butter Mousse & Dehydrated Chocolate & Banana Chips was a bit confusing. A little too deconstructed, the flavours didn’t quite come together. The Fresh Ricotta Doughnuts
Espresso & Caramel Pot de Creme, Espresso Tapioca & Crumble Meringue Wafer were decent but a bit predictable. Although good and filled with diverse flavor, I don’t get the meringue wafer trend. A little too much sweet on sweet.

Doughnuts and Terrine — Doughnuts and Chocolate Banana Terrine

I realize sex sells, but really……

Ummm....Harbord Cappuccino — Ummm….Harbord Cappuccino

My Take

The constant rave about the burger is a bit of a disservice to Harbord room. The complex drinks, brilliant charcuterie and intuitive sides elevate it to iron chef caliber beyond it’s signature dish. In a highly competitive market, Harbord maintains a balance between what works and what might work.

In honour of Kevin Brauch, Harbord room is one of the iron chefs of the Toronto restaurant scene. Challengers emerge, claiming vivacious vibes and great burgers but Harbord has held the test of time against these admirable culinary opponents. It maintains tradition yet remains current in a manner synonymous with the likes of Geoffrey Zakarian. I’m looking forward to the new THR and Co. spin-off in May. Gotta run….I think Tom’s coming to kick my ass. I’d tell him to pick on somebody his own size, but my 13 year old daughter is not home right now.

Review:Toronto:Parkdale:Electric Mud BBQ

April 28, 2013April 28, 2013 spennyrdLeave a comment

Spin-offs can be a dangerous thing. Just asked the legendary Jackee who couldn’t even find success in a pilot on the heels of the late 80s comedy 227. Richard Grieco may agree, given his to attempt to leap from 21 Jump Street to Booker and falling flat on his face. Electric Mud BBQ is a newish eatery cut from the cloth of the highly successful Grand Electric. The theme seems to be an attempt to capture the vibe of its Parkdale brother through its own twist on loud music (in this cases old school blues), trendy snack foods and of course a cash only policy.

The decor is as unique as Grand Electric’s and although not as big or elaborate (which isn’t saying much), there is an open kitchen and seating at both the bar and tables of different shapes and sizes.

Most importantly, the menu is a spin on soul food, with offerings which include fried chicken, slaw, ribs and shrimp ‘n grits. It was in line with the Otis Redding spinning on the turntable as I grabbed a seat at the bar. Like Grand Electric, there is a mix of current and cool cocktails and well as 4 regional microbrews on tap. I opted for pints of a good IPA.

Must

I’ve often said you can’t go wrong with a fried egg on everything, which lead me to order the crispy pig ear salad. The egg was perfect and sat atop a delicate matrix of delicious pork cracking. The seasoning was reminiscent of the spicy squid at Grand Electric. It’s a unique, mind-blowing flavour that keeps me up at night as I lay flipping through channels and watching reruns of Baywatch Nights.

Fried chicken has often been called a simple dish that’s complicated to perfect. The need for a well seasoned, cripsy coating which protects the juicy integrity of the chicken it houses involves culinary wizardry, a magic much more impressive that the minds that thought that a Ducks of Hazzard spinoff starring Enos would be a good idea. The chicken (2 legs and 2 thighs for $8.50) hit the mark (unlike Enos’ aim) on every level. It was crispy and juicy and seasoned wonderfully. It was served with reserve Tabasco sauce and a side of honey laden with Malden salt although the chicken really didn’t need either. Even the pickled vegetables were a nice touch.

The slaw was fresh and acidic and complemented the chicken well. It was a decent serving for $3.50 and would go well with any of the rich dishes on the menu. Let’s call it the Frasier of food; it made Cheers better but also fared nicely on its own.

Maybe

There is an inherent danger in putting pie in a mason jar, much like an attempt to make Joey Tribbiani the main character in a sitcom. Electric’s banana cream pie ($5) wasn’t a pie; it was more a parfait with layers and loose graham crumbs on the bottom as opposed to a defined crust. It was a nice few bites but like Joey, was sweet and a bit confused.

Mundane

With Grand Electric’s pozole (aka dope soup) on my mind, I ordered the crack bread fully expecting the same mind-altering experience. Instead, I was left feeling like I did when Howard Hesseman left “Head of the Class” and was replaced by Billy MacGregor…hopeless anticipation. Even with the elixir of pork drippings and butter as a spread, finishing it would have been like trying to endure a season of “Billy”. Instead of three’s company, in this case the trio of hardish buns reminded me of more three’s a crowd.

My Take

The emergence of Grand Electric last year brought “Happy Days” to hipsters and foodies searching for cheapish, snack foods in the midst of a good vibe. For the same reason, Electric Mud BBQ is emerging as a successful spinoff, highlighting soul food as opposed to nouveau Mexican. Unique cocktails, good draught, great food and old school blues will leave people feeling a vibe more like Mork and Mindy and less like Joanie loves Chachi.*

*It makes me wonder if, in fact, if Arnold’s Diner had a couple of spinoffs, would they be called Pork and Mindy and Joanie loves Sriracha?

Review:Toronto:Downtown:Hawthorne Food and Drink

April 21, 2013May 1, 2013 spennyrd2 Comments

Hawthorne recently opened in downtown with a bit of a mysterious aura. It has no website and relays all its information, including its menu, through its facebook page. The about tab describes the food as:

American (New)

American (Traditional)

Barbeque

Brunch

Hawaiian

Moroccan

Singaporean

Soul Food

Vegan

Vegetarian

It takes up the street level corner of 60 Richmond St which sits about a block southeast of the Eaton Centre. It has the layout out of a old school diner but with chic furniture, shelves of mason jars full of colourful pickled vegetables and on-table dessert menus held up with used wine corks. The menu is highlighted by a signature foursquare tasting meal offering small plates (literally presented on a single square plate) featuring fresh and seasonal ingredients.

Must

Beef brisket is available everywhere and Hawthorne’s offering ($13) competes with some of the best southern joints in the city. Sliced a tad thinner than most, the abundant use of whiskey BBQ sauce and the fattiness of the cut made the sandwich rich and moist and the brioche bun was able to withstand the drippy-goodness. The fries were cut slightly thick and served hot. The homemade ketchup was tasty although quite unorthodox, highlighted by a predominant smoky flavour.

Brisket Sandwich and Kennebec Fries ($13)

I’m a sucker for homemade soda and was pleased to see the Hawthorne offering. I opted for pear-cardamom and quite enjoyed its delicate and refreshing taste. It was not sickly sweet and was as refreshing a a cold Steamwhistle pilsner, the only other drink I’ve ever been served in a glass boot. A shot of gin from the well stocked bar would have made it a neat spin on a gin and tonic if I was in the mood and position for a potent potable.

Maybe

The soup of the day was the unique combination of collard green and lentil which was served in a clear glass pot. Although it was a bit thick, it had consistent texture and a freshness reminding me that the phenols would do their best to protect me from cardiac assault of the upcoming brisket.

I was intrigued by the paella bombs which were described as crispy rice cake, sausage, crab and tomato pepper relish. They were presented beautifully but were covered with mussels and clams which I found odd given the description on the menu.The flavours were great although it taste more like a jambalaya or a pot of mussels and less like a paella. The biggest issue is they were presented cold. I addressed this with the waitress who checked with the kitchen and confirmed they should have been hot. She did offer to heat them up but by then I was almost done.

Mundane

I was told the menu was new so I can understand a few items being lost in translation. However, mussels and clams on a paella is a pretty significant oversight. In addition, the menu indicated that the brisket came with housemade pickles. As a diner who will sometimes order an entree to get such pickles, I was irritated to see their absence. At first the waitress ensured me they were on the sandwich. A surgical dissection of the brisket confirmed otherwise and she went to the kitchen to inquire. The explanation was a typo on the menu and her peace offering was a rather dismal display of a few pickled carrots and sunchokes despite the wide array of options surrounding me.

My Take

There are obvious execution errors (temperature and menu descriptions) and waitstaff who seem a bit uninformed and disorganized. Both should be ironed out with time and practice. That said, the food is tasty and the environment is fresh and vibrant. I left generally satisfied despite a minor case of pickle envy.

Hawthorne is a bit confusing to the point where it lacks identity. It is designed like a high-end diner. The staff are dressed in foodie plaid. Some of the dishes are presented in fine dining style. The location (Richmond and Church) would mainly appeal to business folk and downtown dwellers. It’s a place that a larger group may all be alright with but you wouldn’t choose for any particular reason.

A famous author once wrote:

“Amid the seeming confusion of our mysterious world , individuals are so nicely adjusted to a system, and systems to one another and to a whole, that, by stepping aside for a moment, a man exposes himself to a fearful risk of losing his place forever”.

Although I’m quite sure this 19th century quote was not meant to predict the Toronto dining scene in 2013, I think there are certain elements which are highly applicable. Today’s restaurants cannot be everything to everybody. You can’t be farm to table, nose to tail, organic, foodie-friendly, fine dining and a speakeasy (mentioned on their twitter account and a term coined in 1889 referring to an illegal alcohol establishment) all in one. If you don’t identify who you are, you will be forgettable amongst the many eateries lining the surrounding streets. Hawthorne’s success will hinge on its ability to fit in, without confusion, to a diverse and finicky Toronto dining crowd, a concept ironically penned in 1835 by American author and namesake Nathaniel Hawthorne.

Review:Toronto:Leslieville:Lady Marmalade

April 5, 2013April 5, 2013 spennyrdLeave a comment

Hey hipster, go hipster, soul hipster, go hipster
Hey hipster, go hipster, soul hipster, go hipster

He went Marmalade down in old Leslieville
Struttin’ his stuff on the street
She said, “Hello, gimme some Joe
And maybe an order of french toast”

Mmm, fruity fruity ya ya da da
Coulis coulis ya ya here
Mocha latte ya ya
Here at Lady Marmalade

Voulez-vous manger avec moi, ce soir?
Voulez-vous manger avec moi?

He savored his coffee whch she freshed up
Cuz he couldn’t get a beer or wine.
On the formica table tops where
He started to eat.

Tofu tofu ya ya da da
Lots of veggies options here
All day breakfast ya ya
Here at Lady Marmalade

Voulez-vous manger avec moi, ce soir?
Voulez-vous manger avec moi?

Seeing the hollandiase sauce silky smooth
Along with a cafe au lait
One bite of the eggs bennie inside
Makes you wanna cry, “More, more, more”

It’s only open from 8 to 4
And 8 to 3 weekends (and holidays)
But when he sits down to eat
He wants to order more, more, more

Mexi mexi ya ya da da da
Tortita-gordita ya ya here
Six dollar smoothies ya ya
at the trendy Lady Marmalade.

Voulez-vous manger avec moi, ce soir?
Voulez-vous manger avec moi?
Voulez-vous manger avec moi, ce soir?
Voulez-vous manger avec moi?

Annoying annoying ya ya da da da
Cash only ya ya here
No reservations either ya ya
Here at Lady Marmalade

Tomato and Basil Eggs Bennie with Potatoes and Salad

Tortita-Gordita Dandwich with Soup — Tortita-Gordita sandwich with Soup

Translation

Pros– One of the best eggs bennie going. I think the hollandaise sauce has nicotine or something addictive in it because on occasion i wake up wanting it injected in my veins. Great menu with lots of veggie options. Food is fresh and environment is buzzy and fun.

Cons– Cash only and no reservations and the whole party has to be there seat policy. Blah, blah, blah. Ugly walls. Hardy Boys (I was partial to Nancy Drew).

Review:Toronto:Midtown:Zucca Trattoria

April 5, 2013April 5, 2013 spennyrdLeave a comment

Well outside the garden of trattorias and enotecas restaurants along College street sits Zucca, which many consider the great pumpkin of Italian food. It has a Zagat rating of 26 and Joanne Kates’ has had it just out of the bronze medal position for two years running, trumping godfathers like Mistura and prodigies like Campagnolo. Zucca’s message is simple; turn great ingredients into great food.

Must

I have two confessions:

1. I like playing with my food. I had memories of high school when I had the opportunity to dissect a fish instead of a frog. However, instead of searching for lungs and livers I discovered bouquets of slightly charred thyme and rosemary. I’d give the fish itself an A. My dissection skills, however, get a solid B as I only had a few of those awkward moments (you know…when you miss a bone and want to save face by subtly removing it from your mouth with the cough into the napkin trick or just chewing lots, swallowing and hoping you don’t end up with an mild esophageal tear).

2. I have no idea what kind of fish I had. It was deep sea, delicious and referred to as scarinno on the bill, a word that does not exist on google searches or food dictionaries and costs $40. I emailed Zucca, tweeted Mario Batelli and searched Italian fish blogs to no avail. So, in the end I have to swallow my pride in a manner similar to one of those tiny fish bones.

Mystery FIsh- Not Branzino although it sure looks like it — Mystery Fish- Not Branzino although it sure looks like it ($40)

How can you go wrong with fresh tagliatelle with octopus, pine nuts and a tad of prosciutto? The $16 appetizer size hit the spot. The pasta was delicious. It wasn’t overly greasy and the additions had good textural contrast.

Tagliatelle with Octopus and Pine Nuts $16

Maybe

If you want a plate of meat topped with some cheese and a few sliced cactus pears, then you’re in luck. It’s a decent offering of fresh ingredients with a pleasant presentation.

Zucca Prosciutto with Cactus Pear and Parmigiano ($16)

The affogato di caffe was a fitting end to a meal. It strays a bit from simple with two types of gelato and a massive wafer but maintains the fundamentals of this classic dessert…and it even comes with a cute paper doilee.

Mundane

Although there was nothing mundane about the food, it is old school in service and decor (including a rather awkward design). It’s a bit on the yawnish side and will likely never be considered trendy, but it is well established without the need to peddle wine on tap, neapolitan wood fired pizza or mama’s homemade meatballs.

My Take

Pine nuts, polipo and pears…..oh my! Although it’s a bit sleepy, it has great food, great service and nameless fish. It’s fitting for a business meal or grandma’s 70th birthday but wouldn’t be the venue where you’d retweet witty vignettes about the jays home opener or copious consumption of cleverly named cocktails. It’s a place where you can relax, wear slacks, consume , hear yourself think and once the food comes not have to wait very long for proof that the great pumpkin does exist.