San Francisco – Fare..Eat..Ales

Burma Superstar, Molly Shannon and High School Religion Classes

August 14, 2015September 4, 2015 spennyrdLeave a comment

My last stop in the San Francisco area was at Burma Superstar, the iconic Richmond area eatery offering the mysterious food of Burma. Although Burma is now technically Myanmar, I suppose not having to change the menu or threatening the near 25 year old brand is more important than geographical accuracy. Plus, whenever I hear the name I think of two things; Molly Shannon and high school religion classes. When Burma Superstar was only 7 years old, Molly Shannon and a much younger Will Farrell starred in Superstar which was based on the Saturday Night Live skit. My daughter took quite a liking to the film and almost killed herself trying to do the razzle dazzle on a slippery hardwood floor. On the positive side, it opened up the door for me to add “don’t make out with trees” to the list of things to cover off in birds and bees talk we had later. Regarding school, I had a Catholic education and one thing you could count on was that once a year a teacher would forfeit the normal religion lesson to show the 1973 version of Jesus Christ Superstar right around the time of the Passion.

Based on the numerous web reviews, I knew a visit to Burma Superstar even early on a Saturday evening would mean a line and I was right. We were politely told that the wait would be somewhere in the area of 45 minutes to an hour. I made a note that our table would be right after a couple of sweet old ladies who signed in just before me. We were offered B*Star, Burma Superstar’s sister restaurant as an alternative and, after careful deliberation, we opted for the original instead of the sequel and walked around the neighbourhood for a while.

We were seated in a little less than 45 minutes and, as anticipated, right behind the old ladies. It was a crowded and tight place but we had some reprieve since we were sitting right by the window. We started the highly recommended signature tea leaf salad. It arrived to the table separated into the numerous ingredients (including tomatoes, jalapenos, beans, seeds, fried garlic and a fermented green tea paste) which were skillfully combined table side. The magic in this salad lies in the tea paste for unami and the aromatic fried garlic which elevate the other ingredients. The textural differences were appealing as well.

Another house favorite is the pumpkin pork stew. This is a bit of a misnomer since it is technically made with kaboucha squash. Also called Japanese pumpkin, this gourd is revered for its aphrodisiac qualities which, if I would have known at the time, I may have avoided given the long plane ride home given the fact I was planning to change into jogging pants. It all worked out though. The gross, crowded red-eye home quashed any chance of arousal at 35000 feet. The prominent flavour in the curry was ginger which was a refreshing compliment to the squash. Although I enjoyed the uniqueness of the dish, the kaboucha was very dominant and it’s slimy/starchy texture wouldn’t work for everybody.

I’ll stop here for a second to provide an update on the old ladies that were seated just before us. They were within eyesight and I was impressed by a couple of things. First, they there using the napkins bib-style, meaning they were really getting down to business. Second, each had an Asian beer in the bottle (screw the glass), which they were sucking back rapidly in between bites. Third, those dishes just didn’t stop. One after another, what seemed like a significant part of the menu arrived at the table and yet they tackled them all in that graceful old lady manner. I think I actually teared up and hoped that one day, in my elder years, I could bust into a restaurant and show a bunch of privileged hipsters how to strap on the feedbag.

The third was the Burmese chicken and shrimp casserole. My rationale for this dish was simple; cook anything in a clay pot and I’m happy. In addition, anything with peas makes me happy. I really enjoyed it. The use of the bone-in chicken, the perfectly cooked shrimp and the fact the dish had the elements of both Thai and Indian cuisine were all positives. It was like a jacked up Pad Thai married with a chicken and shrimp biryani.

For dessert I had to try the black rice pudding which we split as a table. It looked like my son’s attempt at a creative bowl of cereal in the morning. It was well balanced between sweet and savory which was catalyzed by the fresh fruit and the abundant use of sesame seeds and almonds.

To end everything off, I glanced over at the old ladies who were looking quite content as they finished off a dessert of their own and tipped my hat to them out of a combination of sheer respect and an overwhelming feeling of awe.

My Take

Burma Superstar is listed as a San Francisco must in almost every magazine and website in existence. It’s success has resulted in the emergence of a number of Burmese eateries including B*Star by the same owners down the street which offers many of the same dishes. The wait is inevitable and long, the quarters are cramped and the food is good. I got schooled by old ladies and was scared to change into my roots jogging pants. In the end, I didn’t want to sing “Hosanna!” from the mountaintops (or my desktop if I was still in high school) or break into the razzle dazzle but I would rate it much higher than 32% on rotten tomatoes.

Yountville Day #2: Oppa Napastyle While I Dream of (Bistro) Jeanty

August 9, 2015August 13, 2015 spennyrdLeave a comment

On my last day in Napa Valley I wanted to go back to Yountville one more time to once again experience it’s quaint beauty, not to mention the fact I was offered transportation in a small red convertible which made me feel like the numerous washed up yuppies back home I see driving around in their open top Chrysler LeBarons. It is a very picturesque drive up highway 29 and the feeling of the fresh wind in my face trumped the sun scaling the top of my head (which is the main reason I have always found convertibles less than enjoyable).

This time I wanted to explore the V marketplace which houses a number of small shops and boutiques. I did a quick tour of a wine shop which offered a wide range of bottles at different types and prices. Not surprisingly, there was some ass hat walking around with his buddy pointing out every wine he has had in the place. I normally wouldn’t care but there was a pompous tone in his voice as opposed to a authentic and organic bliss. In other words, it was more important for him to flaunt his status as a self-declared sommelier than a true wine enthusiast.

The highlight of the market was Napastyle, the Michael Chiarello market which offers a wide range of foodie friendly articles including various foodstuffs, kitchen equipment and knickknacks to enhance any home’s decor and entertaining potential. They had a series of condiments available for tasting which were divine, especially the smoked and spicy olive oils and the fruit vinegar (especially the peach one from what I recall). At this point, we regretted out decision to have traveled with carry on luggage and sucked back a bit more oil before we left.

It was on the tail end of the lunch hour, so we decided to hunt out a place to eat. I would be remiss if I didn’t try and add another star in my Michelin sky, so we decided on Bistro Jeanty, the French cafe in the heart of Yountville. It was quite busy and the patio was full but we were able to secure a table inside. I assume the decor was meant to be a recreation of a rustic and modest eatery in Paris as opposed to the clean and crisp feel of a place like Redd down the street. The waitress arrived very quickly and happily explained the menu. She was polite and courteous in a way that couldn’t be taught and I quickly felt quite welcome.

We decided to split a meal starting with Langue d’Agneau (warm lamb tongue and potato salad) for $15. This dish was a bit of a concession for me but I was curious to see if lamb tongue had the same distinct taste as the rest of the animal. It did. It was as tender as the potatoes and was well complimented by the acidic dressing and bitter greens. The fact that this rather heavy dish was listed on the “lighter side” of the menu was a clear foreshadowing of our upcoming experience.

Dish two was the Quenelles de Brochet (pike dumplings with lobster sauce) for $15. The dumplings were as light and fluffy as cumulus clouds in an atmosphere as thick as that of Venus (ok..this is the astronomy geek in me…Venus’ atmosphere is 90 times more massive than earth’s….and so was this sauce). Taste wise what can I say. It’s butter, cream and lobster. Collectively, I enjoyed the contrast of the light dumpling against the heavy sauce and thought this dish was quite good.

Cassoulet (baked beans, duck confit, toulouse sausage and apple smoked bacon) for $26 was the final dish. Cassoulet is a bit of a generic term used to describe a bean based stew. In fact, it is named after the dish the stew is served in more than a summary of the ingredients in it. I equate it to pork and beans, the North American staple that involves a frantic search through the beans in search of the tiny sliver of bacon strategically placed in each can. Instead with this cassoulet, the fruits of such labour included whole sausage and a duck leg. It was nicely seasoned and did bring back memories of a gold old can of Libby’s. Once again, the dish was very rich and after a few bites, I threw in my serviette and called it day. In fact, I didn’t even think about food for a number of hours afterwards despite walking around in the epicentre of culinary temptation.

Dump $15 and cross $26 — Quenelles de Brochet $15 and Cassoulet $26

My Take

Day one in Yountville featured fresh California fare at Redd whereas day 2 was in stark contrast with the rich French food at Bistro Jeanty. The service at Jeanty was incredible. Despite the use of sauces as thick as the atmosphere of Venus, I wouldn’t call the food astronomical although stellar would still be an adequate description. The V marketplace, specifically Napastyle, is well worth a visit even if to only indulge on a few olive oil and vinegar samples. I the end, I envision coming back to Yountville since I haven’t even scratched the surface of culinary options in this small town. There is Redd Wood, Bottaga, Bouchon, Ad Hoc and, of course, the Michelin star mecca which is the French Laundry. This gives me an idea; I could transport a suitcase of money down to the Napa Valley, dump it on French Laundry’s porch in exchange for dinner and then use it to transport back a arsenal of of olive oil. I guess that means I’d need to check a bag though.

by the power of greystone….i now pronounce you man and wife.

August 8, 2015August 9, 2015 spennyrdLeave a comment

I had an English teacher in grade 9 who I remember well. First, he was a huge Arlo Guthrie fan. While donning his leather jacket, he would play Alice’s restaurant in class as a reminder of what a generation influenced by Guns n’ Roses and Poison was missing. At the time I thought he was a bit of a dork but as I matured I gained a greater appreciation for the folk rock of the 1960-1970s.

The reason I mention this was the fact that I remember this same teacher introducing me to the magnificent works of e.e. cummings, the American poet who died a decade before I was born. From what I recall, cummings was known for his descriptive verses which elevated the feeling of an experience to new levels. In particular, I remember the phrase “puddle wonderful” which describes a feeling that really can only be compared to hopping in a post-storm pool of water with an indescribable bliss. He was also known for his preference for lower case letters which may subconsciously be the reason why I sign my emails with a small ‘s’.

Like many things in high school, I doubted I would ever have the need to pull it out my memory vault but it surfaced when I attended a wedding in Napa Valley (I’ll get back to this), specifically at the Culinary Institute of America Greystone. This beautiful property boasts one of the most unique and coveted culinary programs in the United States. It is also a perfect venue for a wedding and I was lucky enough to be invited to one in May.

The wedding was small and had some stereotypical but also a few surreal elements. There was an Irish priest named Peader who was either really funny, really drunk or both. He was pretty close to a Simpson’s character. The ceremony was outside so his voice was somewhat muted by a flock of birds who chirped as they watched from the crevices in the old building in the backdrop. It wasn’t creepy in an Alfred Hitchcock kind of way….more like Cinderella when the animals united to fix her dress in time for the ball. Instead of the traditional bible readings, one of the passages was “I carry your heart” from the gospel according to ee cummings which brought back high school memories that I found to be puddle-wonderful.

After the ceremony, the festivities moved inside where one could roam around and look at a variety of cooking utensils and hundreds of corkscrews on display. It was a foodie zoo (would that be called a foo?). There was also a stellar market place that was in plain view but guarded by glass walls and a less than enthusiastic security guard who looked more inclined to drink bourbon with us than make sure we didn’t steal spatulas. While I began down the path of mild intoxication we were treated to a few starters including a delicate scallop which swam in a delicious and spicy puree and a mini bulgogi soft taco which didn’t disappoint. There was also a duck empanada (not pictured) which rounded out the delicious and diverse hors d’oeuvres.

Growing up, in addition to learning about the literary merits of American poets, I was exposed to many Northern Ontario weddings which involved rubber chicken dinners and cash bars. The closest thing to culinary innovation was half a dozen Parisian potatoes to complement the prime rib and green beans. Move the venue from Sudbury to the Napa Valley and make the wedding couple a pair of urban foodies instead of a blue collar uncle on his third marriage and watch the sparks fly. In this case, the food was presented in four food stations which were chosen based on the ethnicity and preferences of the bride and groom. There were French, North African, Filipino and Korean posts. My objective was to try a little of everything. The first station featured a salmon en croute but with a twist; the addition of black cod (since it is the bride’s favorite fish) served with an herbaceous salsa verde. There was also an arugula and endive salad. I love black cod and will be first to admit it would be tough for it to hold up in both taste and texture in a en croute preparation but it was saved by the salmon. The salsa verde was brilliantly fresh and a perfect condiment for the delicate cod. The addition of the bitter greens was a smart contrast against the sweet whitefish.

The North African station featured spiced game hen with a tajine of quinoa and spring vegetables along with a dollop of preserved lemon and olive tapenade. Personally, the hen was my favorite dish of the night. It was moist and bursting with flavour. The quinoa let the hen shine but didn’t disappoint on it’s own. I love preserved lemon and I loathe olives, so I was curious to try the tapenade. The olives won but that’s not to say that it wasn’t a smart combination for those that enjoy the nasty little fruit.

The focus of the Filipino section was suckling pig which was complemented with truffled mac and cheese and a chilled spinach salad and pickled vegetables. There was also a pineapple mayo and some fish sauce to add some sweet and salt respectively. The joke at our part of the table was whether the truffled pasta was authentically Filipino or a creative interpretation orchestrated by the groom. The pork by itself was a little underseasoned but the diverse flavours which surrounded it were more than enough to compensate. I thought the spinach salad and pickled veggies were brilliant.

The final stop was Korean which featured short ribs as the headliner. I was intrigued by the loosely defined “risotto” which was a porridge of multiple types of rice along with barley. The station was rounded out with a sugar snap and sprout salad and kimchee as a traditional condiment. The ribs were a bit flimsy but well seasoned. I am typically not a risotto fan but I enjoyed its complexity and mouthfeel. The salad was fresh but I would have loved a little more crunch from a few more snap peas.

Each station was paired with a California wine which included a Charles Krug Sauv Blanc at the French station, the Morgan 12 Clones Pinot Noir for the North African offerings, the Caymus Conundrum for the Filipino food and the Ravenswood Vinters Blend Zinfandel partnered the Korean fare. I thought the choices were quite complimentary. I’m still a little naive when it comes to all the elements of the marriage between wine and food but I could appreciate these pairings. I had tried the Caymus in the past paired with pasta and was excited to see it on the list. As for the Ravenswood, I liked it so much I sought out and purchased a bottle when I got back to Ontario.

Dessert (or mignardise) followed the choose your own adventure theme and offered a variety of trendy confections including macarons, eclairs, truffles, creme brulee and chocolate covered strawberries which hit the spot in between the IPAs and the 90’s pop blaring across the dance floor. The wedding cake was a stunning croquembouche.

My Take

I was quite keen to attend this wedding in Napa Valley even if it meant a cross continent flight and I wasn’t left disappointed. Beautiful scenery, great food and a good group of people made for a fun weekend. I think this is a good blueprint for weddings whether the couple of honour are a pair of foodies or not. A short ceremony infusing a stereotypical Irish priest, the infusion of the works of an modern American poet in addition to the typical biblical stuff and visually stunning surroundings was a great trifecta. As for the reception, the wide variety of sentimental and meaningful food choices was brilliant. The idea of wine pairings replacing the typical chardonnay and cab sav house wines at the table elevated the experience even more. I tip my hat to the CIA Greystone for great execution of a rather complicated meal. Most importantly, I would like to congratulate the bride and groom and wish them all the success in their future endeavors and I selfishly encourage them to consider revisiting this concept again in the future.

In sum, I’ll use the same Virginia Woolf quote that was scripted on the back of the wedding program; “One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well”. I couldn’t agree more.

Hoping Reddington Keeps me off the Blacklist After My Blatant Voyeurism at the French Laundry

July 25, 2015July 25, 2015 spennyrdLeave a comment

After a night of a little too much scotch, I had to muster the strength to venture up the road to Yountville, a quaint village north of Napa which is full of beautiful scenery, fancy restaurants, artistic gardens and specialty shops. I was invited to lunch at Redd, which is described on their website as an updated wine country menu with international influence. It ‘s the decade old project of respected chef Richard Reddington who should not be confused with fictional international criminal Raymond Reddington of Blacklist.

The decor is simple, roomy and classy. The waitstaff are professional but not pretentious. I started with hair of the dog in the form of a large goblet of a delicious house red. To start I went with the appetizer special which was a hamachi collar atop asian slaw. The slightly fatty, slightly fishy taste went well with sweet but pungent taste of the overdressed slaw.

Enough with the pseudo-healthy crap. I had a post-scotch apocalypse to deal with. The fried chicken sandwich fit the bill. Smothered with melted Gruyere cheese, it seemed the perfect remedy to my self-inflicted woes. Plus, it was served with onion rings which were delicately breaded and quite light. The sandwich was a posh McChicken that hit all the notes needed for a post hangover ration.

With the booze sweats complete and a reasonable amount of grease in my digestive system, I ventured down Yountville’s main drag to take in some of the scenery. It was surprising quiet given the weather was near perfect. The walk included trips past rock gardens, markets and a couple of Michelin star restaurants, ending at the ultimate destination in any Napa culinary adventure; The French Laundry. Until now, this Michelin three star establishment has been a figment of my imagination. In one sense, its legendary status makes me an immediate fan. In another, I wanted to see it first hand so I could better justify the 300 per person charge. The exterior is rather modest and the inside is a secret which can only be viewed through small cracks in the window blinds. I left a bit like a voyeur but I could justify it given the fact their very public garden is right across the street for all to see. Speaking of which, it was a fantastic parcel of land filled with ripe strawberries, cauliflower, fresh herbs, a chicken coop and even an apiary. The energy of the place was magic and suddenly the French Laundry’s price tag didn’t seem so outrageous.

The walk back included a stop at Thomas Keller’s Boulage bakery for an eclair and an Americano, both of which were quite satisfactory and well under $10, a far cry from the price tag associated with his other venture.

The day ended with a drive out to the Stag’s Leap region of Napa Valley and specifically to the aptly named Stag’s Leap cellars which were responsible for the vaulting of California reds into the upper echelon of wines worldwide. In 1976, the Stag’s Leap Wine Cellars 1973 edged out three French reds including the highly respected Château Mouton-Rothschild 1970 to win the international tasting and the rest is history. Historically, the only upset that rivals this was the historic and nauseating miracle on ice in 1980 which also involved the US as a massive underdog against the powerhouse Russians.

View from Stag's Leap Cellars — View from Stag’s Leap Cellars

My Take

Yountville in Napa Valley is a must go destination for any foodie. Redd is a classic example of Californian fare. The decor, much like the food is clean and simple but subtly elegant. The walk along Washington street is like following the yellow brick road on the way to the castle but in this case the destination is the French Laundry and there are many distractions along the way including the Boulage bakery and the Laundry’s own garden. As much as I clicked my heels together, I could not transport myself into the secret quarters of wizard Keller’s castle. Can anybody lend me $300?

I Didn’t Get Crabby but I Managed to Get Bitter at Oxbow Public Market in Napa

July 24, 2015July 24, 2015 spennyrdLeave a comment

Almost every city, big or small, boasts a market and Napa is no different. Shortly after arriving in town, I headed down to the Oxbow Public Market to check it out and grab some lunch at the bib gourmand rated C Casa. Oxbow is a mid-sized indoor market with a combination of shops and restaurants. You can get anything from charcuterie to ice cream.

My biggest target at Oxbow was C Casa, a bib gourmand rated joint featuring unique tacos and other fusion Mexican fare. I was giddy in line in preparation for my $9 fresh crab taco. Sadly, the crustacean was not in stock and I had to resort to other options so I settled with the pork carnita tostada with white beans, corn relish, poblanos, micro greens, romaine, lime crema and cotija cheese ($5.75) and the rotisserie duck taco with spinach, red onion, goat cheese, oranges, cumin vinaigrette, avacado crema and cilantro ($8.00). These were expensive tacos so I was happy to see them arrive with a heaping pile of fillings. The pork tostada was a mess as there was no graceful way to eat it. The beans were such a smart addition and the crema was equally intelligent. The thought of duck and citrus was a little frightful but it worked reasonably well. It was less like a taco and more like a spinach salad on a tortilla. There is a good variety of local pints as well. Beer and tacos are a beautiful couple.

Pork Carnita Tostada ($5.75) and Rotisserie Duck Taco ($8.00)

After barely finishing the Mexican monstrosities, I strolled around the rest of the market in complete awe. It was like an angel met me in my sleep and asked me “If you could build a market, what would be in it?”. My answer would be an oyster house, a spice shop, a kitchen gadget place, a butcher, charcuterie, ice cream and a fancy place where I could get bitters and shrubs to tinker with my own cocktails at home. Voila! That’s Oxbow Market. In particular, let me focus on the last place. I have gotten a little more experimental with my homemade potent potables and my struggle has been the inability to find bitters outside of the standard angostura. Many of the Toronto bars brag about walnut, green tea, cherry bourbon and other fancy additions to their old fashioneds and it pisses me off. The Napa Valley distillery has the largest variety of bitters I have ever seen. I was a kid in a candy store as I wandered around aimlessly thinking of the adultery I could commit but combining a number of these flavours with a bottle of Bulleit bourbon. Ironically, it was the first time I realized a significant number of the bitters were produced by Dillon’s, the Niagara distillery a mere 160 km away from my house.

Oh ya…they have a bunch of organic crap at Oxbow too.

My Take

If you go to Napa you most definitely should drink wine but you have to come here!!!!!! I have to admit knew nothing of the Oxbow market prior to my Napa visit. Once there, however, I entered this nirvana which contained all my vices under one roof. Although I didn’t indulge in every one, I got to sip pints, eat tacos, taste bitters, smell spices, stare at striploins and sleep well afterwards. C Casa was probably deserving of bib gourmand status but did not serve the best taco I ever had (and they didn’t have crab). They were busy and overfilled but had good flavour. For any foodie, I highly recommend a dreamy wander through Oxbow Public Market. Although C Casa made me a little crabby, I’ll save my bitterness for Dillon’s on Tufford road in good old Beamsville, Ontario.

I Say Frittata, You Say Frittata While Getting my Rocc’s Off in San Francisco

July 21, 2015July 22, 2015 spennyrdLeave a comment

Before heading up to Napa, I decided to scratch another triple D off the list by heading to Rocco’s Cafe on Folsom Street. It is a classic Italian cafe offering typical fare from pastas to Italian sandwiches. The timing wasn’t right for dinner so a breakfast visit was the next best thing.

The decor was old school Italian diner. There is an open kitchen and more pictures than selfies in my daughter’s instagram account hanging on the wall. It has a friendly feel complete with happy cooks and equally pleasant waitstaff. There is a certain magic about a true rundown/rustic Italian cafe and Rocco’s had the right semblance.

As much as I was tempted to go with the Grilled Homemade Polenta topped with Cheese & Marinara Sauce w/ Eggs any style with Italian Sausage, I figured the mushroom, onion, basil, & parmesan cheese frittata ($11.95) was authentic enough for an Italian cafe without the need to paralyze myself. Now, the word frittata is up for interpretation. By definition, it means fried but there are all sorts of interpretations. Most of them fall somewhere on the spectrum between an omelette and a crust less quiche but usually dictate that some element of the filling is cooked within the egg. Rocco’s offering was closer to an omelette and not quite what I expected. Nonetheless, it had good flavour and seasoning and more than abundant fillings/toppings. The potatoes had a slight off taste I just couldn’t identify but overall they were decent.

Mushroom, Onion and Parmesan Frittata with Potatoes and toast (not shown) $11.95

On the way to the subway I was craving an Americano so a quick google search told me Wicked Grounds was just around the corner. Don’t get me wrong, I could have hit a number of other coffee houses on the way but I was intrigued at the thought of sneaking in behind the closed curtains to experience a fetish cafe in the early morning. I didn’t expect much at 830 am but there were a few customers and some very nice, courteous staff along with plenty of cuffs, paddles and other paraphernalia for sale. Most alarming to my virgin eyes was the option to have a drink served in a dog bowl for those who chose to be subservient on that particular day. I was tempted to order a decaf and a paddle to go but I stuck with the former along with a granola bar which promised to be more awesome than a cat riding a unicorn. It wasn’t and I left humming Chris Issak.

It wasn't — It wasn’t because a cat riding a unicorn is pretty awesome

My Take

I suppose there are worse things to do than search for a good breakfast and an amerciano from a fetish cafe in one of the most liberal cities in the world. What’s even better is when you get a decent breakfast and knock another DDD and getting a coffee from the same place I’d buy a blow up doll..screw you Walmart. In the end, regardless of where the frittata fell on the spectrum, it was a decent plate and the Wicked Grounds coffee was good even if I was able to get my Rocc’s off again.

Attempting Piquant Progress after Last Year’s Spectacular State Bird Seance

July 7, 2015July 7, 2015 spennyrdLeave a comment

I had the chance to get back to San Francisco in May for a wedding (yes I realize it’s July but other duties called) and one of my targets was the progress, the newish spin-off of the highly successful and quite enjoyable State Bird Provisions. I went there last year and it was easily one of the best restaurants I went to in 2014. The progress boasts a choose your own adventure 6 course family style meal for $65. Keep in mind that the table needs to agree on six dishes which may prove to be a very daunting task depending on your table mates. On this night I was meeting two people I had never met, so in essence it was a blind date minus the romance. I had no idea what they liked to eat, what aversions they had and what their culinary hot buttons were.

It turns out these two were rather laid back and choosing the menu was really not that difficult. One was rather naive to the nuances of the foodie code (ie. ramps are another word for cool onions) while the other was driven by a value proposition which made her gravitate to ordering the perceived most expensive dishes on the menu. I had no issues with this at all. So, after a deliberation much faster than the OJ jury, we chose our six dishes and waited with anticipation. While waiting, I noticed the decor and buzz was less chaotic than its sister restaurant. The service was more traditional meaning there wasn’t an army of cooks and chefs offering you a bite at every turn. It still had a high hipster factor, driven by both the staff and the patrons sitting at the bar and around the tables.

The first offering with a complimentary amuse bouche which featured seven snacks including zucchini blossoms, sauced-up radishes, broad beans, fried mussels, a twist on chips and dips, spicy citrus and some jerky in the middle. It was a pleasant start and opinions as to what was the best was all over the board, Personally, I enjoyed the jerky and the citrus.

One of my choices was the salad of wild king salmon with basil-marinated zucchini. The main reason was my vivid memory of a king salmon dish I had from State Bird the year before. At this point it was evident that the menu description only offered a fraction of the secrets each dish held. There were salty, crunchy and creamy tastes and textures immersed in the aforementioned listed stars of the dish.

Next were the razor clams on the plancha with kimchi piccata. Other than sounding like a Jimmy Buffet tune, it was served with the very foodie friendly watermelon radish. The star of the plate was a little less than spectacular but in the end the dish was pretty good.

Third was a treasure chest of fermented sausage, trout quenelles and sweet onion-rice dumpling in a creamy pork broth. I loved the absolute confusion of this dish. They pretty much took every food fetish I have and threw it into a bowl. I’ll eat anything fermented, any sausage, any dumpling and any broth…especially if it is poured in front of me. I’ll admit I was a little perplexed but it was like a buffet in a bowl in a blissful foodie dream.

Treasure Chest Pour

treasure chest of fermented sausage, trout quenelles and sweet onion-rice dumpling in a creamy pork broth.

Next was more sausage and seafood; this time lamb merguez (I conceded this dish given my distaste of lamb) with yellow eye beans, octopus and crispy squid. As expected, it wasn’t my favorite dish. Despite the crispiness of the squid, it wasn’t as texturally balanced as the other dishes. The octopus was just ok.

Lamb and Octopus — lamb merguez with yellow eye beans, octopus and crispy squid

I was probably most excited about the maitake, tofu and bok choy stir fry with smoked black cod ponzu. I love mushrooms, smoked food and black cod and my bliss was amplified when it was presented covered in one of my favorite morsels…sweet peas. I was a little disappointed since the cod ironically lost that beautiful texture through the smoking process. It was a little too salty as well.

The final dish (we decided against dessert) was the aromatic spiced squab with salted chili paste. Once again, the dish presented with a bit of a surprise when it was evident it was meant to be eaten like a cross between a lettuce wrap and a tequila shot. It only came with two legs (complete with the claws) for three people but there wasn’t a huge fight over who got them. The quail itself was cooked nicely and they were fun to assemble but the overall flavour was pretty average.

progress quail — aromatic spiced squab with salted chili paste.

My Take

There is always a danger when it come to a spin-off or sequel , especially when the first effort is so good. The list of sophomore flops is endless; take Three’s a Crowd, Flo and Joanie loves Chachi for example. In the case of State Bird Provisions, there were high expectations when it came to its neighbour and sister restaurant, the Progress. Some of the dishes lived up to the State Bird name while others missed the mark. The progress’ offering of the salad of king salmon and the treasure chest were amazing whereas the lamb/octopus and the cod, although good, missed the high bar set by its predecessor. So, the Progress is in no way the X-Files’ ridiculous spin-off the Lone Gunman. Instead, I see it more as Breaking Bad’s slightly more than mediocre Better Call Saul.

Rich Table:The Last Supper, Dan Brown, Exodus 16 and Foodieism as a Religion

September 13, 2014October 3, 2014 spennyrdLeave a comment

The fact that Rich Table was my last supper in San Francisco (this was from my trip back in June..I’m a little slow these days) made me wonder what the famous last supper was like. I mean, the biblical account by each of the disciples was fairly uniform. Jesus took bread, gave it to his disciples and ate it as a symbol of his body. He then took wine, proclaimed it as his blood and passed it around. Sounds pretty simple but I wondered what would happen if Jesus was a foodie. I mean, what if he wasn’t happy with a 21 Herod’s Fury Merlot and send it back or got upset over the fact the bread wasn’t served with EVOO and a crisp balsamic vinegar.

These thoughts made me realize that being a foodie is like a religion if not a cult. Think about it….can you not picture the foodie couple getting the kids ready in their little plaid shirts from the Gap so they can go to the 11 am seating at Sunday Brunch. Instead of the Eucharist, they break and share aged cheddar scone and wash it down with french pressed coffee or a mimosa, Caesar or some other potent potable deemed acceptable on a Sunday morning. Any alms are already included in the inflated brunch prices

Ironically, I stumbled across a website which used a scientific ranking system (science and religion don’t mix) for San Francisco restaurants based on a statistical formula which took into consideration everything from San Francisco Chronicle reviews to eateries awarded Michelin stars. Rich table was ranked number 1, beating out bay area juggernauts such as Coi, Saison and Quince. It’s another one of these places with a one month reservation policy but they were very polite in answering all my email questions and promptly booked me a big table when the time came. Due to the size of my group, I was told via email we would have a $65/person menu served family style.

Fast forward a month. We had a short wait as the table before us was finishing up the earlier reservation. It was buzzing for a Monday night and the small place was full of fragrant and savory smells. After being seated, I realized I had a great view of the open kitchen. A friendly waiter soon arrived and handed us a few copies of the gospel according to Rich and I was reminded that it was a preset family style menu. The menu contained 14 items divided by starters, pastas, mains and dessert. I asked the waiter how many of each we could order and he politely informed me we were getting them all.

The flip side of the menu featured the beverage offerings which included almost a dozen beers, red and white wines and half a dozen cocktails. I started with an El Jeffe which is a mezcal based drink with grapefruit, tarragon, aperol and bitters. It was a refreshing summer drink with a nice amount of bitterness. Throughout the remainder of the meal, the table developed an affinity for the Bobby Burns, a potent elixir of a holy trinity of scotch, vermouth and benedictine and finished with bitters. It started rough but finished smooth and a few of them went down as the night went on.

Genesis (starters):

Sardine chips, horseradish, creme fraiche– A thin slice of potato slitted,”stuffed” with a sardine and deep fried. Served with a horseradish chip dip. Spectacular!

Douglas fir levain, house cultured butter– Heavy, moist and extremely flavourful bread. I had to limit consumption because wouldn’t have had room for anything else.

Burrata Cheese, Strawberry Gazpacho, Chicken Skin and Almond- This was one of the table favorites. It was burrata elevated to a new level. The sweet/sour gazpacho would have succeeded as a stand alone in a big bowl, especially since it was sprinkled with some of the magic chicken skin.

Little Gems, Bottarga, Dill, Crispy Onion- An ingenious spin on a caesar salad that held it’s own against the other innovative starters on the table. The balance of bitter/salt and cream/crunch was phenomenal.

Crispy Potatoes, Grilled Raddicchio, Garlic Chive and Comte– These went quick. Once again, near perfect from a taste and texture perspective.

Dried Porcini Doughnuts, Raclette Cheese- I’m convinced that the manna which spilled from heavens in the Old Testament may have been these donuts. They were amazing as a stand alone but became a religious experience when the cheese dip was added. A table of grown adults looked like a group of kids attacking a family pack of timbits or Homer Simpson hitting a Krispy Kreme when the red light is on.

The Pasta of Pastas

Pappardelle, Crayfish Oil, Goddess Melon, Pickled Jalapeno, Shiso– The pasta itself was done perfectly. The array of flavours was a bit much for some but I thought it worked well. The melon provided a surprising burst of sweetness which I admit was a bit odd but in the end the dish worked.

Garganelli, Housemade Sausage, Tomato Gravy, Basil- Once again, the pasta was spot on. The flavours were very traditional which was almost surprising considering the uniqueness of all the other dishes at the table. That said, it left you with that rustic, home-cooked feeling.

Tagliatelle, Braised Duck, Aged Sake and Almond- This was my favorite of the bunch. The use of sake reminded me of a penne alla vodka and the almonds nicely complemented the rich flavor of the duck.

The Gospels (Mains)

Summer Squash Gratin, Kale, Local Gouda, Mixed Herbs- Beautifully presented, this dish was a cross between scalloped potatoes and a mac and cheese with greens. The abundant use of the herbs and crispy kale added a great punch to this common yet uncommon offering.

Pork Loin, Toasted Wheatberries, Cherries and Wildflower Honey- I’m a big fan of using cherries with most meats and pork is no exception. The balance of the flavours was great and I really enjoyed the wheatberries. I wish the pork was cooked a little longer. I’m not adverse to a cut of pork cooked medium but I felt the slight undercooking of the loin affected the texture.

Alaskan Halibut, Corn Grits, Chanaterelles, Bouillabaisse, Pistachio- This was my least favorite dish of the evening. The halibut was a bit limp which didn’t lend well to the fact that the surrounding ingredients has the same texture. It was like a big plate of mush.

Revelation (Dessert)

Coconut Panna Cotta, Toasted Meringue, Lime Crumble- Nice texture and nice flavours. This was a fresh way to end a large and rich meal. I could have taken or left the meringue.

Salted Chocolate Sable, Milk Ice, Mint-Chocolate Mousse- This one had mixed reviews at the table. It was very minty and very chocolaty so those who aren’t extremists thought it was a bit much.

My Take

Although Rich Table hasn’t been blessed with a Michelin star by the food gods, it’s cumulative acclaim ranked it number one in San Francisco on sfist.com and statistics don’t lie. It’s interior is somewhat humble but not overly crowded. The large table beside the open kitchen makes for a great dining experience, especially if you are in a big group. The service was professional and smart. The cocktails were heavenly and wine list is reasonable including a reasonable corking policy which allows for the waiving on one corking fee if you buy a bottle there. As for the food, there was a huge selection for a very reasonable $65 per person served family style. The offerings were brilliant although the entrees were somewhat anti-climatic compared to the starters and pastas. The porcini doughnuts (as well as the fowl at State Bird Provisions) are biblical, suggesting that if Foodieism is in fact a religion, San Francisco is definitely the Mecca of the foodie movement given these modern day interpretations of manna and quail first mentioned by Moses in Exodus 16. When thinking of my last supper at Rich Table, I couldn’t help but think of “The Da Vinci Code” by Dan Brown and hoped that my dining experience wouldn’t be like the book; overhyped and lacking substance. Instead, it was much more “enlightening”, perhaps suggesting that if the Illuminati did exist, they would eat like this.

Burger Bar: McMillan and Wife Villains, Fleur de Lys Sauce and Drops of Jupiter in my head

August 30, 2014August 31, 2014 spennyrdLeave a comment

San Francisco is known for a number of things including:

1. TV- It has been the setting for a number of TV shows, past and present. Notable shows have included Full House, Hotel, Party of Five, and Dharma and Greg.

2. Music- Some of the more notable bands in American History hail from the San Francisco area. Classic rock bands like the Grateful Dead, the Steve Miller Band, Santana and Jefferson Airplane, modern day rockers Third Eye Blind Train and even one hit wonders 4 Non Blondes began in the Bay area.

3. Food- Everything from bakeries to renowned food trucks to some of the most famous restaurants in the country reside in San Francisco.

That said, I realized that after 5 days in San Francisco that I hadn’t had a burger yet. Like any other city with any sort of food scene, there were numerous choices. After a quick scope of burger research in the Bay area, it only made sense to go to the Burger Bar. Not only was it across the street from my hotel, it was the creation of Hubert Keller, one of the most respected chefs in the US. According to his website, Chef Keller was the first great chef to give burgers the haute cuisine treatment, from freshly ground, hand-shaped burgers to a menu of innovative toppings in a hip, casual setting. Sounded good to me.

The hip, casual setting started with a 6 floor ride up the Macy’s elevator. We got to hang out with a portly businessman who was obviously heading to the place I was and a couple of old ladies who got off at the 4th floor to hunt down some red tag sales. The elevator opened to reveal a bright,open restaurant with bar and table seating. We quickly ordered a beer from a reasonable selection of draught and examined the menu. The burgers ranged from $10-$60, the latter being a Remixed Rossini Burger which was kobe beef stuffed with short rib topped with lobster tail and shaved black truffles and truffle sauce on an onion bun (doesn’t quite flow as well as the Big Mac song but I’m sure Train could sing a song about it in the style of “50 Sides to put on a Burger”..funny thing is there are exactly 50 sides available at the Burger Bar). I went middle of the road and order the peppercorn burger for $17.25. In particular I was interested in the famous Fleur de Lys peppercorn cream sauce. I also liked the option of skinny vs fat fries…..I like the fatties when it comes to fries and these didn’t disappoint. The burger hit the mark. The well seasoned patty wasn’t overwhelmed with pointless toppings. Even the famous sauce was served on the side so as to not disrupt the precious patty.

My Take

I have plenty experience with San Francisco television and music set in San Francisco. I grew up in the mid-eighties wanting a new drug while I didn’t stop believing and felt sorry for my sister for having to endure Sara by Jefferson Starship. I scratched my head wondering how Jessie from full house scored Rebecca Romijn, saw the Olsen twins before they were tramps, witnessed the fact that Thomas Gibson actually had the ability to crack a smile and tried to figure out why people thought Jenna Elfman was funny.

I can now go to bed knowing I have experienced my share of San Francisco’s trinity of Americana; television, music and food. Not only did I have a burger, I had it with the same sauce served at the iconic and now historic Fleur de Lys. Hubert Keller seemed the perfect guy to provide it (not only is he a renowned chef but he looks like a villain from McMillan and Wife).It was an expensive but delicious taste of the Bay area. I must say I also enjoyed the steak fries which are as difficult to find as a “Sister Christian” 45. I’m glad I left though because a few more Keller burgers and I’d probably end up with a unplanned visit to Trapper John MD and “Drops of Jupiter” in my head for the next six months.

SPQR (Senātus Populusque Rōmānus): King Herod Prices And Pasta as Bloody as the Assassination of Caesar

August 30, 2014August 31, 2014 spennyrdLeave a comment

SPQR had me fooled. Given it was awarded a Michelin star for fine Italian food, I expected a stuffy, polite, quaint restaurant filled with overdressed waitstaff who pour wine with one hand behind their back. My first suspicion that I was wrong is when I walked past it a few nights before on my way from State Bird Provisions to Altier Crenn. From the outside, the vibe seemed more hipster than a classic Italian joint with the presence of surprisingly pounding, quaky rhythms as opposed to uncle Vito playing the violin table side.

I emailed quite a bit in advance to see if I could secure a table of 6 for a group I was with at a conference. They told me such as table was not available but when I got on open table I was able to secure two tables of 4 at the same time. It seemed odd to me…sorta pretentious;quite risible in fact. On the day of, I was a real nuisance and called to see if we could combine of two tables of 4 into one table of 5 due to a few last minute cancellations. They hesitantly accommodated us but once I walked in, I understood the issue. The restaurant is not designed for large groups. Small tables are crammed into every square foot of the smallish dining area. When seated, one of us ended up stuck in a swelling, protruding, quillon-resembling seat which blocked the path of everybody walking by.

The menu changes frequently but usually focuses on a decent array of appetizers, a number of pasta dishes and a few mains. There is no doubt the pasta is the cornerstone of the menu given the fact there are usually a dozen or so smart, piquant, quirky rations available at any given time. I started with the octopus garnished with kale sprouts, panissa (a lemon chick pea cake) and a vibrant puree laced with pistachio. Chick peas and octopus work so well together and the panissa was a creative and enjoyable way to marry the flavours . The octopus was tender and the subtle use of lemon accented everything well.

Octopus $20 — Octopus, kale sprout, panissa, chickpea, pistachio and preserved lemon $20

Although I didn’t opt for the pasta, members of my dining party did and I had the opportunity to try a few bites of each. The bucatini “straw and hay”, california blue cheese, linden walnut, kale and sage brown butter ($26) was a delightful interpretation of this popular combination. Whole walnuts and sage leaves along with large pieces of kale made it a visually appealing dish which was able to balance the intensity of the rich cheese sauce.

Bucatini “straw and hay”, california blue cheese, linden walnut, kale and sage brown butter ($26)

Another tablemate chose the famed and in the eyes of some, risky blutnudlen which sounds more horrific than the assassination of Julius Caesar. This popular dish mixes blood pasta with blood sausage ragu and pig’s foot breadcrumbs ($25). I must admit it was a novelty to try but beyond a few bites a sanguine pasta queming ravenous hipsters is not my cup of tea. It was rich and flavourful and reminded me why, as a pseudo-Catholic, my consumption of blood tends to stop at transubstantiation. I couldn’t imagine finishing the whole plate.

Instead of pasta, I opted for the Guinea hen “rosticceria style”, wild rice porridge, roasted strawberry, turnip and pink pepper ($36). The presentation was a pleasant mess. The delcious hen was almost hidden among the colours of the Italian flag. The texture was somewhat reminiscent of a good shawarma. The meat was crispy but held in its moisture. The wild rice porridge was vibrant and the strawberries sweetened the pot. The sulphur of the turnip rounded the plate out.

Guinea Hen $36 — Guinea Hen “rosticceria style”, wild rice porridge, roasted strawberry, turnip and pink pepper ($36)

We decided on a family style approach to dessert and ordered a trio which included 1. fried blueberry pie, butterscotch, lemon curd and burnt sugar gelato, 2. hibiscus bombolini, cherry vanilla, cherry bark vanilla and fior di latte gelato and 3. peanut and milk chocolate pudding , malt and chocolate gelato. The consensus at the table was that the bombolini was the best followed by the pudding and the fried blueberry pie (all $14). The blueberry pie was the one I was most excited about but there were too many flavours and the butterscotch didn’t really fit. The pudding was boring looking and tasted almost the same. It was very predictable which was kind of odd given the dishes which led up to dessert.

Blueberry pie $14 — Fried blueberry pie, butterscotch, lemon curd and burnt sugar gelato $14

Hibiscus Bombolini $14 — Hibiscus bombolini, cherry vanilla, cherry bark vanilla and fior di latte gelato $14

Peanut Dessert $14 — Peanut and milk chocolate pudding , malt and chocolate gelato $14

My Take

Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears;

I come to critique SPQR, not to praise it.

The dishes that men eat lives after them;

The good is oft inferred with their Michelin star;

So let it be with SPQR. The noble bloggers

Hath told you the menu was ambitious:

If it were so, it was a hipster’s demand,

And graciously hath SPQR answer’d it.

Here, under leave of Accarrino and the rest–

For SPQR is an honourable place;

So are they all, all honourable chefs–

Come I to speak in Fareeatales.

SPQR is a perfect fit for Fillmore Street in San Francisco. It ignores the traditional concepts of fine Italian dining by presenting beautiful dishes but throws away the spacious room filled with white linen in favour of a labyrinth of small table scattered throughout a broom closet. The service was characteristic of the latter with the staff dressed in black as opposed to a shirt and tie. The food was delicious and deserves the accolades it has received over the years. That said, I have to agree with many that say the food is somewhat pricey; quasi-ridiculous in fact. Perhaps Herod had a role in charging $25 for pasta and $14 for dessert. Despite this, the place is always jam packed so it doesn’t seem to deter the masses. In the end, when I polled my guests to see if they majority enjoyed the experience they agreed that it was stupendously polished;quorum reached.