I was listening to Russell Peters on Sirius radio the other day. It was a replay of his classic rant on arranged marriages. I thought a little about it and tried to imagine being in that situation. In a universe filled with energy flow and frequencies, I can’t imagine being attached to a woman who would nag me about my food desires, affinity for a pint or the fact that I sit up at weird hours documenting the trials and tribulations of my culinary journals while watching HBO shows.
That said, it was at that point that I realized I have had an experience almost as excruciating…the “arranged lunch”. Let me explain. While in San Francisco, I sent out a general invite offering to bring any of my colleague’s customers out for lunch. I had a few bites and arranged to bring out a group. I had no idea who they were but figured lunch at the Slanted Door, the well established Vietnamese restaurant in San Francisco’s pier would be a safe call. I met the first of the four at the convention centre for a walk to the pier. I had met her once before so it wasn’t hard to strum up some conversation. We arrived at the rather large and very busy restaurant about twenty minutes later. It has a wide open concept with tables offering various views including the kitchen and bay areas. The rest of my group hadn’t arrived yet, so we waited by the door (I never noticed if it was slanted or not) so we could be seated. Much like a blind date, I watched people stroll in trying to predict who I’d be meeting. Finally, three ladies walked in who seemed to the fit the bill. After some quick introductions, we were seated around the corner in a half circular booth against the wall.
I’ll be the first to admit the menu is a bit long but these ladies made it look like they were reading the bible. The scowls and whispers trying to identify any dishes somewhat recognizable. I quickly realized the extent of their Asian experience was limited to chicken balls and fried rice. My fears were further confirmed when the table seemed either confused or appalled when the waiter suggested we order family style. To avoid further hardship, we agreed to choose a dish each. My dreams of trying some of the more innovative offerings of the James Beard recognized iconic eatery was going up in smoke.
In addition, my guests continued to make various observations including the fact that most of the waitstaff were males and they need more women on the floor. Nothing like a gender equality talk to spice things up. That said, I did find the service a little arrogant.
The scowls continued when we were notified that diet coke was not a menu option. The non-alcoholic drinks mainly consisted of spritzers and juices. So, a couple of them ordered lemonade. I had a a ginger soda.
I decided to be a bit greedy and order the gulf shrimp and pork wonton soup ($7) to start. I don’t think anybody cared. After all, the combination of seafood and pork might have thrown things into array. Fragrant, light broth housed noodles and dumplings which were tender and perfectly cooked. It was a large bowl but didn’t care much that I didn’t have to share.
Gulf Shrimp and Pork Wonton Soup $7
The vegetarian rolls ($12) served with peanut sauce were stuffed with mushroom, tofu and cabbage. They hit the mark although nothing spectacular but seemed to be acceptable at the table.
Vegetarian Spring Rolls $13
The grilled organic chicken with vermicelli ($16) was one of the safer bets on the menu so I wasn’t surprised to see it ordered. It went pretty fast but I did manage to get a bite or two. Nicely seasoned and nicely cooked but once again, nothing remarkable.
Grilled Organic Chicken $16
Sticking with the safe poultry theme, we also had lemongrass chicken ($18). A few mumbles about the spice levels circulated the table but I found it had a nice level of heat.
Lemon Chicken $18
The woman I walked over with ordered the trout served with green mango and a chili sauce. It was easily the best dish of the meal. The fish was moist and the accompaniments were a great contrast.
Trout Filet $20
My choice was the cellophane noodle with dungeness crab ($20). Very disappointing. I probably could have had all the crab in the dish on a tablespoon. It was so torn up that the pieces looked like specks in the abundant heap of noodles.
Cellophane Noodles with Dungeness $20
Vegetables included boy choy and snowpeas (each $11) from local farms. They were fresh, simple and nicely prepared.
Bok Choy $11Snow Peas $11
My Take
Slanted door is likely the most well known Vietnamese restaurant in San Francisco. It’s location and reputation makes it a popular destination for lunch and dinner. Personally, I found it a bit overpriced for very good but not spectacular food. The lack of crab in a San Francisco restaurant overlooking the ocean is the ultimate and sad irony.
In the end, I don’t recommend arranged dining, especially at a place that revolves around family style dining. I walked back to the convention centre with the first woman I met and couldn’t help but ask if that was the most painful dining experience she ever endured. She enthusiastically agreed and I felt a little better. If the success of “It’s just lunch” or other dating sites hinged on a dining experience like this, there’d be a lot more single people in the world.
There seems to be something about offering breakfast in a hotel. I’ve stayed in numerous hotel across Canada and the United States and can make a few general observations about the most important meal of the day:
1. Free breakfast usually involves a large common room populated with sports teams, messy haired kids wearing butterfly wings and hungover parents. Some will settle for a cold boiled egg and plain bread because the line up for the waffle machine and the toaster is too long. If you do get the the waffles, it’s a complex process of pour, fill, rotate and wait. While waiting, you look around and make conversation with a family member, a stranger or the orange juice carafe in an effort to avoid the jeers and dirty looks of the 15 people in line waiting for Belgian deliciousness. Kids are allowed to have free reign at the breakfast apparatus confirmed by the crunch of fruit loops beneath the feet of morning zombies.
2. For those who prefer to eat a croissant while blow drying their hair, there is the room service option. Fifteen bucks will get you a choice of baked goods (with preserves of course), a shot glass of orange juice, a carafe of house coffee and a individual tub of Activia yougurt delivered sometime between 6:45-7:00. An extra 10 dollars will get you a “hot” breakfast with some eggs supposedly kept warm by the use of a plastic cover. Either way, the tray ends up on the floor outside door and the faint smell of ketchup fills the halls along the walk to the elevator.
3. For those adventurous enough to leave their quarters, breakfast at the hotel restaurant is a third option. Similar to an amusement park, the convenience of proximal eating comes at a premium. The biggest decision is the choice between the $30 buffet which allows for the dried fruit and nuts as well as the bacon, the $15 continental buffet which the excludes pork products and the premade eggs benny or the a la carte menu which frequently involves a double take at the prices. That said, at least there’s free refills on the coffee.
Attached to the Hotel Zetta in San Francisco, the Cavalier offers breakfast, lunch and dinner. Intrigued by it’s honorable mention in this years James Beard nominations, I wanted to experience at least one meal so I went for breakfast, especially given its proximity to the convention centre. It is constructed to look like a high end pub one may frequent after a game of polo or a fox hunt. It’s a small menu with 4 or 5 standard morning items. I opted for the breakfast sandwich consisting of eggs, crisp bacon, pepper cress and a mustard dressing for $13. I was promised the crispy potatoes were worth it so I added them for another $6. I finished off the order with a $4 stumptown decaf coffee. The sandwich was delicious; all the components from the bun to the red onion, cress and mustard condiments hit the mark. The potatoes, as promised, complemented the sandwich and the coffee was probably the best I had in San Francisco. That said, it ended up being a $23 breakfast.
The breakfast Sandwich ($13) with fried potatoes ($6) and Stumptown coffee ($4)
My Take
I’m not saying that I expect to get a breakfast sandwich combo at a hotel for the price of an egg McMuffin combo. Don’t get me wrong, the food was delicious and the service was pleasant but $23 is a little steep. I would have liked to try lunch of dinner to assess the vibe (it was a bit dull and sleepy during the morning hours), but one can only hit so many places while in town. Maybe James Beard wasn’t a morning person but hell, at least there were free refills.
When I think of Seven Hills, a few things come to mind:
1. It sounds like the name of an ABC sitcom that involves some washed-up actor or actress who chose a TV career for a change of pace instead if admitting their last five movies have made less than 25 million combined in theatre revenues.
2. It might be the title of a country song which describes the trials and tribulations of the contours challenging a John Deere tractor in the attempt to harvest a bumper crop of wheat.
3. It could describe the geography of the walk from O’Farrell to this Hyde St. eatery in the Russian Hill district.
In fact, it is a relatively quaint Italian joint located between the pier and the bustling, tourist-ridden O’Farrell street. It doesn’t get the fanfare and hype of the more visible eateries but regularly sits in the top 25 of the 5000 San Francisco restaurants on tripadvisor. We booked a table for six which seemed to take up a good portion of the restaurant as we were seated in the back corner. The menu changes regularly but focuses on classic fare in a classic setting. It’s evident when you read the menu that the place pledges allegiance to locally sourced food. The vegetables, herbs and proteins come from a guy named Jim or Bob or Jim Bob and from places like Full Belly and All Star farms.
The service staff was cordial but a bit confused. They had a couple of waiters taking care of our table who had different levels of understanding. For example, I was offered a unique white wine by one waiter whereas the other had no idea what I was talking about when I ordered another glass. That said, there was a definite and rightful pride in their demeanor when describing the rustic dishes.
The table agreed on an array of first plates to share which ranged from $9-15. First, we were treated to an amuse bouche which was a delicious melon soup. The duck liver pate was a bit unorthodox in that it was served chunky country style instead of smooth like the surrounding eateries. That said, it was pretty decent. Other choices were the meatballs, arancini, burrata with tomato and prosciutto and carpaccio. In summary, none were remarkable but none were bad either. If I had to pick, the meatballs won the battle.
Melon Soup Amuse BoucheArancini, Duck Liver Pate, Meatballs, beef carpaccio and burrata with prosciutto ($9-15)
In the meantime, as more people crammed into the small quarters, the temperature rose to the point of slight discomfort. With more of a crowd the service got a little choppier. For the main I ordered the squid ink (or neri) pasta. Like the Italian cliche, it was delicious in it’s simplicity but became a little monotonous even with the addition of a generous amounts crispy breadcrumbs. I found the portion size quite ample and of good value for the price.
Neri (Squid Ink) Pasta
My Take
Seven Hills is the quintessential small family run bistro within a very diverse and vibrant dining scene. It’s simple in it’s theme, decor and food. There are no major surprises and I imagine no major inconsistencies. There’s a true commitment to partnerships with local farmers which comes out in the food. If you’re looking for adventure, there’s a hundred other places. However, if you want a safe haven for traditional fare or have a table full of people who thinks Joe Bastianich should be canonized and lament the fact that Mario Batali will never open a restaurant in San Francisco, this could be your place. Sure, there are service hiccups but it lacks the phoniness of chains and smiling hostesses who seem way too excited over the fact you might have a coat to check. After dining at Seven Hills, I think it can be described as a sitcom about an all American small Italian ristorante frequented by Al Pacino and Tony Danza with cameo appearances by Ray Romano and Robert DeNiro (playing local farmers Jim and Bob) and lovable yet confused waitstaff including the likes of Joey Tribbiani.
When it comes to the restaurant scene, San Francisco is a well-oiled machine. It is a mecca for receiving culinary awards such as Michelin stars and James beard nominations. As a result, there is unity among eateries in this posh destination. For example, seemingly every restaurant website in the city has an sf on the end of the restaurant name on their website domain. It’s a badge which lets the world know that “we are in San Francisco and you’re not”. Take http://www.coquetasf.com for example. It’s the brain child of celebrity chef Michael Chiarello and aims to bring trendy Spanish tapas to the tourist-ridden piers of the city by the bay. This effort was awarded with a nomination for a James Beard award for best new restaurant in 2014 although in the end it was edged out by Pêche Seafood Grill in New Orleans. I anxiously awaited the one month window to arrive so I could vigilantly get online and make a reservation. Since the lunch and dinner menus are similar, I booked at noon to take full advantage of a sunny San Francisco day by the pier. The decor follows the mold of many other San Francisco eateries in that it’s well decorated in a rustic yet modern fashion. In the kitchen area, shelves of jars and bottles sit beside pots that I’m not sure are ever used. Place settings are available along a long marble bar while the rest of the restaurant consists of nice, high hardwood tables. There is also area outside as well which provides protection from the sun but a nice view of the bustling pier and sparkling water.
Coqueta’s Interior
Like most tapas menus, temptation is plenty. There are hot and cold plates with an array and meets, cheeses and vegetables. What immediately caught my eyes were the pintxos; bite-size skewers carried around by the staff in an effort to challenge will power. The platter was an attractive mix (from left to right) of quail egg, asparagus, boquerones, chorizo and Serrano ham. AT $2.50 a pop, they were well constructed with a nice combination of salt, sweet and acid. To my surprise, the quail egg was the least enjoyable, while the Serrano ham with Manchego cheese and the apricot conserva was fantastic, offering fundamental spanish flavours and textures all in one bite.
Various Pintxos $3.50
It’s a daunting task taking four people with very different tastes to agree on a tapas spread, especially with a menu as complex as Coqueta’s. Anybody who has dined with me knows I’ll go for the eggs every time, especially with memories of the Huevos Cabreados I had in Barcelona a few years back. I went for the “Sunny side-up” Huevo With Shrimp, crispy potato, and chorizo dressing ($13). The egg was cooked nicely and shrimp, despite the size and skimpy portion, were seasoned and cooked well. The potatoes were white and a bit flaccid and literally paled in comparison to their Barcelona counterparts. I think if you’re going to mash an egg into matchstick potatoes, they need to be able to hold their integrity to a degree.
“Sunnny side-up Huevo with shrimp, crispy dressing potato and chorizo dressing ($13)
A tapas meal is not complete without some Spanish poutine, also known as patatas bravas $8. Although in some ways I’m a conservative when it comes to adherence to traditional dishes. It’s rare that I make any food the first time without adhering to the traditional way of doing things. So, I’m a little skeptical when I get a haute cuisine version of a very traditional dish. Hand dug potatoes replaced the wedges I’m accustomed to. The normally messy presentation of a piquant sauce and creamy alioli was subbed for a tomato base in a side dish and a white dollop atop a freshly dug potato.
Patatas Bravas $8
The Croquetas de Pollo Chicharon (crusted Chicken and English pea croquetas with cured cara-cara orange) for $9 were ok. Keep in mind I’m impartial to croquetas to begin with and these were no exception. Decent taste. The cara cara orange tried to cut into the creamy fried mix but it’s still a croqutea.
Croquetas de Pollo Chicharon $9
The Ensalada de Remolacha (Roasted baby beets with Sausalito watercress, beet vinaigreta, tierra and cabrales blue cheese snow $9) was a pretty dish which combined purple and gold beets with the green and white of watercress and cheese respectively. It tasted pretty too.
Ensalada de Remolacha $9
The Calamares a la Plancha (Whole Monterey calamari on the plancha with onion jam and squid ink alioli) $10 was a creative yet authentic dish. The calamari was tender and the ink allowed for a little fun and tasty play time. The jam was a surprising but delicious addition to the mix.
Calamares a la Plancha $10
I love deviled eggs, so my vote was for the Huevos Nacional (deviled eggs filled with spring pea, smoked pimentón alioli, on pickled saffron potatos and olive oil poached Bonito $7). Beautifully presented, it was easily the most complex deviled egg I have eaten. It was almost confusing although using a pickled potato as a pedestal is a tasty and practical idea I not might use myself the next time I make the picnic favorites myself.
Huevos Nacional $7
The generous use of delicious fish highlighted the salmon ahumado (Smoked salmon queso fresco and truffle honey-$8). Piled on top of fluffy cheese and sweetened ever so slightly, it was an interesting spin on bagel and lox. Thankfully, the truffle was subtle and didn’t overpower the star of the dish and I found the sweetness from the honey instead of the normal use of salt from something like a caper worked well.
Salmon Ahumado $8
Another pretty dish was the Esparragos Trigeros con Romesco (Wood grilled green and purple Delta asparagus with coal roasted romesco salsa, raw Manchego and Marcona almonds $14). There was a smokiness to it that was tamed by the colourful accents. The salsa was delicious.
Esparragos Trigeros con Romesco $14
The most carnivorous tapas order was the Albondigas a la Feria (Grilled duck and pork meatballs with tart cherry and tempranillo salsa and crispy shallots $12). I really enjoyed the flavour of the duck and pork together although a little greasier than I would have liked. The chefs were stingy on the shallots which was a bit disappointing because it would have added a crunch to the meatball.
Albondigas a la Feria $12
My Take
Eating at a restaurant is like watching a movie. First, you need a plot. Coqueta entered the already bustling San Francisco dining scene by offering Spanish fare with a Californian twist. Second, you need a director, preferably a big name. Michael Chiarello certainly fits the bill. Next, you need to enhance the plot with a combination of a great setting and cast. Coqueta’s decor and service were excellent. The waitress, for example, modified the size of the standard order to accommodate the four us (so we had enough but didn’t need to order two servings) with no issues at all Since the James Beard awards are like the Academy Awards of all things food, I was excited to dine in a restaurant who was shortlisted for best new restaurant nationally. However, sometimes when I watch a Oscar-nominated movie, I get lost in the complex plot and end up missing the point. A few dishes at Coqueta were like that; it was a good experience but a few dishes were confusing and overly complex. The experience was helped by great service and a good location. Like the movies that don’t quite win an Oscar, I was curious to experience those who were just honored to be nominated.
Since I was going to be away from home on Father’s day, I decided to treat myself to an early gift and make a reservation at Atelier Crenn in San Francisco. I figured I could break the bank and a little and treat myself to my first two Michelin star experience. My rationale was two-fold. First, they have a condensed tasting menu which allows one to experience the restaurant from $120, a far cry from some competitors who request more than $200 for their similar sized menu. Second, I’ve had a food crush on chef Dominique Crenn even since I saw her appearances on both Iron Chef America (in which she beat Michael Symon) and as a guest on Top Chef (in which she won the French vs Spanish food challenge). I walked up and down and up and down and up and down Fillmore to get there and was seated quickly as I waited for my work colleague who agreed to join me in order for this culinary expedition to begin. In the meantime, I hit the washroom (or restroom as the Americans say). Even a two Michelin star restaurant adheres to the San Francisco norm of a unisex, single washroom philosophy.
Once my colleague arrived, we were presented with the aforementioned option of the $120 condensed menu or the more elaborate $195 one with close to 20 courses. As stated above, I opted for the former. The menu is presented in poetic form, leaving the dishes to both the imagination and a reliance on tips your grade 12 english teacher gave you about how to interpret Shakespearean stanzas or the opiod-filled sagas written by Samuel Taylor Coleridge. The menus seem to rotate according to the seasons, so I got the spring edition. We did not opt for the wine pairing but were quite happy to indulge in a couple of the excellent Belgian beer from the small beer menu (I imagine even Chef Crenn couldn’t justify trying to serve a French beer with her food..I doubt a Kronenbourg 1664 would make the cut). In particular, the Strubbe’s Flemish Red ale was quite delicious and nicely complemented to the array of food that was served over the evening.
Spring has come with its cool breeze
A spin on the French aperitif Kir, this amuse bouche was served with a warning; don’t bite it until it’s in your mouth. It had a delicate exoskeleton of a hazelnutty-cocoa filled with a cider-based elixir. It certainly stimulated the taste buds and reminded me to quit thinking and let my peanut of a right brain run the show for once.
Mellow serenades of colors liquid and orange
My initial thought was I might get a bowl of tiger tail ice cream. My mother, who grew up wishing she could have given birth to a Bengal tiger, would often truck us out to the ice cream parlor. Whereas I would have an ice cream I hadn’t tried before, she ALWAYS got tiger tail which is orange flavoured with licorice streaks. Thankfully, this was a duo of hors d’ oeuvres. The first was an oyster seasoned with green apple, tobacco and coffee. The second was a sea urchin mousse topped with salty caviar. The texture of the mousse and the combination of flavours in the the oyster were sublime. The coffee was ever so subtle but added a surprising and delightful finish to the starter. The poetry of the evening was further exemplified by the use of the urchin and oyster shell shaped dishes.
A gentle smell, oceanic, of yummy feeling
Hidden beneath an array of green was a piece of Japanese mackerel which was served raw. The freshness was evident but what blew me away was the cilantro ice dust which started benign but ended with a blast of flavour which filled the dimensions of my mouth like spray paint. It was one the most surprising, elegant and magical movements of the evening. The finishing touch was a fried foodie-friendly turnip which was strewn across the plate.
The half moon, silky and smoky
I think a French chef would be remiss without trying to redefine some of the more stereotypical homeland dishes which have been bastardized by years of American influence. Take french onion soup for example. Chef Crenn replaces the salt-laden, broiled cheese and bread covered thick broth with a more complex and refined base of caramelized onion with a delicate red wine vinegar gelled cheese dumpling bobbing in the middle. The dark, scarlet broth surrounding the dumpling did in fact look like a moonlit scene. Tastewise, it was refreshing and it was quite pleasurable cutting into the tender dumpling which was a easy target once the surrounding gel dissolved into the broth. If anything it was on the sweet side but that didn’t take away from the experience.
I refreshed as I gazed at your smooth green coat
The intermezzo was a simple pickled green strawberry salad with watercress and more magic green dust. Sour, acidic, vibrant and palate cleansing.
Walking deep in the woods, as the earth might have something to spare
My grade 13 english course told me that this could either be mushrooms or a toothpick. Luckily it was the former. A collection of fresh and rehydrated mushrooms were strewn across the plate and adorned with a variety of other earthy flavours, most notably what I think was a hazelnut rosette on one side of the plate. The lack of symmetry meant I didn’t get another one on the other side but instead was treated to more pixie dust so I was just fine.
These creatures, who move with a slow, vague wavering of claws
It only makes sense that a chef who practices poetic culinaria would name a dish after a line from a poet on the literary side. “These creatures, who move with a slow vague wavering of claws” comes from the “The Lobsters” written by Amercian poet Howard Nemerov. It’s a sombre tail of the imprisoned somnambulists faced with the ultimate destiny of being served to humans beside a sauce of melted butter. Other than that, the only clue we received was a mysterious knife which looked too innocent to do anything harmful. The puzzle was soon solved with the arrival of a chuck of brioche bread and flavoured butter. Soon after, a lobster bisque arrived accented with sweetbread biscuits and bone marrow and garnished with pickled onions and sea grapes. The soup was rich on rich which was cut somewhat by the acid in the onions. Honestly, I found the brioche mediocre but the soup delicious. By the way, biting into a sea grape which, like a 4-year old with red smarties I saved until the end, tasted like biting into a mouthful of ocean.
Mystery Knife
Where birds sing and are causing ripples in the nearby water
Now that we were getting the hang of the menu game, we arrogantly proclaimed that the next dish had to be duck. I mean, the clue combined with a French chef at the helm made perfect sense. Even Inspector Clouseau could figure out that one. However, we were thrown a french twist when a piece of guinea hen showed up. Served far from overcooked with some fried greens and a slightly rendered fat cap, it was a fine enough finish to the savory component of the meal athough likely the least remarkable. Do guniea hens sing anyway?
Nature has churned up a tornado of milky , rich flavour
Ok, I made that one up but it sounds better than just saying the cheese course. My lack of will power coupled with the fact that I had to stare at these blocks and wheels of dairy goodness made resistance futile. Of the four french cheeses available, we opted for a blue and a raw cow’s milk offering. Served with honey and a cracker-like loaf, both were exquisite and a nice addition to the meal for an extra $25.
Spring has come and is full of sweet surprises
Guessing which French dessert would be served would be near impossible, especially since we were humbled by the last course. After a short wait, a trio of waitstaff arrived carrying two plates and what looked like a honeycomb. The latter was placed between us and I had a sudden urge to play ping pong. The dessert itself was a nicely executed combination of sorbet atop a lavender or chamomile or some kind of girly tea-flavoured cake accented with a few other sweet sauces but no table tennis paddles. Hidden within the comb were the surprises: beeswax coated honey bonbons which brought me back to the days of spending nickles and dimes on wax teeth filled with some concoction of sugar and food colouring. Visual, it was stunning. Tastewise, it was quite acceptable as well.
Sweet raindrops speckle my satisfied tongue
This line is made up too. It describes the trio of mignardises (ie little desserts) that arrived after the meal. Homemade marshmallow kisses, guava fruit gummies and blackberry macarons we laid out on a glass platform. Delicious!
Mon Point de Vue
Atelier Crenn is definitely a bucket list restaurant for anybody who wants to experience a Michelin two-star restaurant, meet a celebrity chef or justify the copious amounts of time spent reading poems in high school. Once again, my mom was right when she said “you’re going to need this stuff in real life some day” about my english classes. I agree with the thousands of reviews on yelp, urbanspoon, tripadvisor etc. which state that the food is whimsical, artistic, creative and delicious. One thing I found a little interesting was the fact that the menu was almost completely void in red meat and pork. Perhaps San Francisco rubs off on even the most discerning French chefs.The service aspect has been more of a contenious debate, however. First, I appreciate Chef Crenn making the rounds. She was far from modest when I told her I was an adoring fan who knew she won both Iron Chef and the Top Chef competitions. Second, I agree with some reviewers that the service is somewhat pretentious but I found nothing wrong with it. Nothing bothers me more than phony waitstaff who assert their supposed knowledge above the heads of the very people they are meant to serve. That was not the case here. Instead, I found it to be more of an orchestra of professionals. For example, despite the fact I was seated against the wall in the middle of the restaurant, the servers also approached the table doorside, even it if meant taking the longer route around tables. At least 4 or 5 service staff delivered food throughout the night and each was as skilled as the next in explaining the dishes.
Part of a tasting menu is always the element of surpise and the openness of the layout of this place can spoil things a bit. I got really lucky for two reasons. One, we were a few courses ahead of the table beside us so our experience wasn’t tainted by seeing them get their food first. Second, they went all out and got the full tasting menu so we also got to see what we didn’t get.
In the end, Atelier Crenn was an investment in a great dining experience. It had all the elements of a night of fine dining including poetic references, shaking hands with a celebrity chef and fantastic food,great beer, exquisite cheese and magic fairy dust. I can summarize the experince in one poetic line: Looking up in the sky I see two rightful Michelin stars beaming down.
I have a confession. Let’s set the stage. State bird in San Francisco is known for next to impossible reservations. At midnight pacific time, a small block of reservations open up for the date exactly two months later. So, I crawled out of bed at 3 am eastern time, wearily opened my computer, entered the security code (the demand for reservations forced them to implement a security measure through open table similar to the one where you buy concert tickets) which I thinks was either “goodluckbuddy” or “youareafool” or “gobacktobed” and was shut out. It seemed my only opportunity would be to get in line and wait it out with the rest of the lottery losers. Despite the fact that state bird has very minimal outdoor signage, it’s not hard to figure out where it is….it’s the place with the line. Located on the not nice side of Fillmore, I arrived about 45 minutes before to find about 15 people waiting. During the wait, I thought about other things I have waited 45 minutes for:
I waited 45 minutes with my daughter to get on that swan ride at Wonderland. You know, the one where you ride a plastic bird at a quarter mile and hour in 2 feet of stagnant water for what seems like an eternity so your kid can feel like the queen of water fowl.
I once waited with my grandmother for 45 minutes in anticipation of the next K-mart blue light hourly special. Elated by securing some fancy glassware she just bought, she was more than happy to wait for the opportunity to snap up the next deal on women’s hosiery.
My mother asked to me wait in line for almost an hour to get her a limited edition commemorative royal family beanie baby a number of years ago. I stood in line with a bunch of blue hairs bragging about their collection ranging from the Princess Diana purple rose bear to some rare fish named Bubbles.
Come to think about it, I ordered a pizza in university circa 1993 that I’m still waiting for so I guess 45 minutes isn’t that bad. As time went on, the line got longer and it also got fatter. I never read the memo where one person was allowed to get there early and hold two or three spots for friends showing up later. By the time 530 rolled around, there were more like 20 or 25 ahead of me. When the doors finally opened, the line quickly funneled in to the open doors. Group by group, patrons were seated. I was starting to sweat a little when I finally got to the front of the line. The two groups in front of me were still waiting for truant tablemates so they were asked to move aside until the whole party arrived. I gladly proclaimed “Table for two and we are both here!’. The woman at the door (who turned out to be one of the owners), yelled out 3/4 as we entered State Bird Provisions. It turned out 3/4 means we were seated right in the middle of the chef’s table. Let the fun begin….
Hanging with some carrots and peppers at seat 3/4
The concept is simple. About half the menu is served dim sum style. As members of the illustrious chef’s table, you not only get to witness the creation of this dishes, you also have first dibs at the eats. As each comes up, the chef explains the dish (don’t ask before hand!), tells you the price and you decide if you want it. My will power melts like hot butter when offered food so I had a hard time saying no. If you agree, the chef, waiter or any other staff member checks off the number that corresponds to the cost. The other half of the menu consists of larger dishes which you order a la carte. Included in this are things like trout, bone marrow and the famous pancakes. Given the fact I tried a number of dishes, it makes sense to list them in order of preference to try and bring some order to what turned out to be a night of modest gluttony:
1/2 dozen cast iron quail eggs $12
The best dish of the night. Six quail eggs are flash fried in a hot skillet among a flavourful broth boasting a nice blend of heat and acid. I asked the chef about it and he let me know the heat came from pressed jalapeno juice (not brine from a jar of picked peppers). Brilliant! It was also served with chunks of Mt. Tam cheese, pea hummus and a few garlic chips. I discussed this local cheese in a previous blog but as a reminder it’s a local brie-like cheese that added a wonderful silkiness to the dish. Combined with the earthiness and freshness of the hummus and along with peppery arugula, it was a complete dish that was a cross between a destructed omelette and having the supernatural ability to consume many components of a tasty volcano.
1/2 Dozen Quail eggs
Air-dried beef with chili juice, rice powder & garlic chips $8
I got to watch the creation of this dish from start to finish. It’s remarkably simple. Quality beef quickly fried on a flat top along with copious amounts of rice flour (which i thought was salt until he added about a cup of it on the beef) which browned nicely, keep the meat moist and added a delicious crisp coating. It was topped with fresh scallions and garlic crisps for extra visual effects and flavour.
Bad picture of air-dried beef with chili juice, rice powder & garlic chips $8
State Bird with provisions $9
California has the privilege of having one of the only edible state birds. I find it interesting that I can’t pick a trillium in Ontario but I can eat a quail in California. I’m sure this liberty isn’t granted in every state. After all, Robin au gratin from Wisconsin or Tex-Mex Cactus Wren from Arizona certainly does not sound as appealing as a chunk of deep-fried Californian quail.The coating on the half bird was crispy and seasoned nicely. It was a tricky but enjoyable navigation to eat the small bird in fried chicken fashion but well worth the effort. Useless trivia fact: the cardinal is the most common state bird (7 states-Illinois, Kentucky, Ohio, North Carolina, Indiana and both Virginias) followed the Western Meadowlark (6-Kansas, Montana, North Dakota, Nebraska, Oregon and Wyoming) and mockingbird (5- Mississippi, Arkansas, Florida, Tennessee, Texas).
State Bird with provisions $9
King Salmon Tartare with Pickled cucumbers and toasted quinoa $10
A very quirky fish girl snuck up behind us offering a tartare prepared table side. The salmon looked beautiful so it was hard to resist. The tartare was scooped atop some modestly pickled cucumber and topped with a delicious blend of toasted quinoa and roasted seaweed. Nothing beats freshness and the salmon fit the bill. No need for crostini..the quinoa mix gives it the perfect amount of crunch.
King Salmon Tartare with Pickled cucumbers and toasted quinoa $10
Guinea hen dumpling with aromatic broth $3
I missed the first go around of these single dumplings soaked in broth. Thanks to one of the chefs who hunted one down for me a little later, I was able to indulge. Dumplings are a simple creation that can be screwed up quite easily. The dumpling was crisp but not overcooked and the filling to dough ratio was perfect. As promised, the broth was aromatic although a little surprising. I’m used to salt as the predominate taste in a dumpling broth and in this case it was more sour and complex but delicious nonetheless.
Guinea hen dumpling with aromatic broth $3
Raw oyster with spicy kohlrabi kraut & sesame $3
I love oysters. They are a glorious way to begin a meal. I have been teased by friends of mine that I look like a kid in a candy store when I order them. I take great pride in the careful construction of the oyster including ensuring it is loosened from the shell and has the appropriate amount of horseradish, mignonette, seafood sauce etc. In other words, every mollusk is a canvas and I get to play with the paint. Keeping that in mind, I found the oyster delicious with balanced and unique seasoning. It’s just a shame I couldn’t play with it some more.
Raw oyster with spicy kohlrabi kraut & sesame $3
Duck liver mousse with almond biscuit $6
Although no dish was sold to us in used car salesman style, the most boasted item was the duck liver mousse which has been a staple since State Bird opened. I took the opportunity to take a jab at the chefs but reminding them that duck liver is not as common in Canada because we can still serve fois gras in restaurants and duck liver is a weaker substitute. The mousse was smooth, light and fresh but what impressed me the most were the almond biscuits. In most cases, the savory and liver-bitter spread is served with a neutral crostini but the sweet biscuit brought it to a new level.
Duck liver mousse with almond biscuit $6
“Caesar Salad” $5
A unique spin on the classic caesar, it had all the elements with a few surprises like pickled vegetables. It was a good salad, just not as remarkable as the other menu items.
Caesar Salad $5
Mushroom farro spezzato with smoked egg $8
I’m pretty sure I have this dish right. I remember it describe as similar to porridge. The flavour from the nicely cooked mushroom was front and centre but I did find the dish got boring and predictable very quickly. It wasn’t bad put did pale in comparison the number of other dynamic and taste bud teasing dishes I ate during the night. I loved the smoked egg yolk but it got a little overpowered by the predominant mushroom flavour.
Mushroom farro spezzato with smoked egg $8
Garlic bread with burrata $8
Although I enjoyed watching this dish being made more than any other, in the end I was a little disappointed by the flavour. The dough is rolled with precision,dropped into hot oil and fried donut style. It is then seasoned and finished with the new San Francisco treat and ubiquitous bay area cheese…burrata. The underseasoned crispy bread coupled with the bland and sloppy cheese just didn’t work for me although I did enjoy the aggressive use of the black pepper.
Garlic bread with burrata $8
BONUS: Shots of ‘world peace’ peanut muscovado milk! When we decided to pass on dessert (we both had other engagements to attend), the staff almost looked sad. They take enormous pride in their dishes and would let us leave without having a shot of the world peace peanut milk. One word: outstanding. It was a delicious nectar which collected the X-factor of the delicious legume into one delightful shot.
A Shot of ‘world peace’ peanut muscovado milk
My Take
There were some initial annoyances and misconceptions that I had about State Bird Provisions. First, I found the reservation system stupid and annoying. Second, star sightings like Ryan Gosling and the national hype made me think the vibe would be pretentious. My mind was changed with the fact that when I emailed them in advance to ask a few questions, they were authentic and cordial in their responses. Once you are in the place, you are treated like royalty or a VIP member of an exclusive party. No fewer than 6 staff members talked to us, told us their stories, explained the food and beamed with an authentic pride unlike most restaurants I have dined in. They got to know you, asked for opinions and treated you like a human, not a credit card. In summary, it was delicious FUN. They didn’t need gimmicks or loud music or dorks with attitude dressed like fools to create a self-serving brand. Instead, a cool concept with great service and fantastic food with the customer as the focal point is what earned this place a Michelin star. As for the 45 minute wait, the experience inside made it well worth it. It’s not like I haven’t wasted an hour or two of my life before; I did watch the Place Behind the Pines after all.
Perhaps it’s fitting I’m typing this as I fly over the Western plains toward San Francisco. Home of the Brave are the four words which tell you the Star-Spangled banner is over and is usually held for about 16 bars while some celebrity exercises their creative right to make the song their own. It is also the title of a 1988 Toto song, perhaps a patriotic attmept to recreate the success they had in the early 80’s with the Grammy winning album IV featuring the song of the year Rosanna as well as Africa. The phrase is synomonous with the USA, so it seems an appropriate name for a snack bar which celebrates Amercian culture and cuisine. Such a concept may be a daunting task however. There is nothing universally consistant with American food. Each region adheres to a philosophy and a stubbornness which is much an identity as an local accent. That said, gravy is pretty close.
Toronto’s homage to our southern neighbours sits hidden among King Street favourites Lou Dawg’s, Lee and Wurst. Relative to other eateries, it about the size of Vermont, boasting a reasonably sized bar, a number of tablesand booths and even a few “patio” seats which overlook the King Street scene. I was quickly greeting by the bartender who offered me a bar seat. I sat and looked around. A bustling open kitchen was nestled in the corner. The bar area was decorated with American paraphernalia including references to many of the urban centres which make the USA the diverse and interesting country it is. From a drink perspective, they adhere to the American way. They feature beer, wine and cocktails all produced or inspired by America. There are even a few cocktails created through feedback from the guestbook of American visitors. I was in the mood for a pint, so I opted for an $8 Sam Adam’s Boston lager which was frankly the only palatable beer on the draught list. They do carry a few bottles from the historic Anchor brewery in the city I was in flight towards. The vibrant beer scene in the USA is misunderstood by so many Canadians who simply say “All American beer is water” and HOTB reinforces this misconception by offering crap like Coors Light and Rolling Rock as essential American suds.
The menu is everything you would expect in a stereotypical American eatery, offering eats like Philly steak sandwiches, chicken and waffles and Maryland Crab Cakes. In addition, almost every dish, including vegetables, contains one of the three components of the America culinary trilogy: Gravy, sauce, cheese or a combination of two or three. In celebration of Napoleon Dynamite and his home state of Idaho, I was obliged to try the tater tots complete with the obligatory cheese AND gravy. They were nasty, delicious chunks of what seemed like deep fried mashed potatoes which sitting in a shallow pool of fat.
Tater Tots $7
It was wing night (which means they serve wings…not the fact you get them for $0.36 each or whatever the going discount rate is) and I thought nothing could be more American than sucking back a pound of chicken parts. The flavour of the night was Tex-Mex mole, a celebration of the Mexican influence on United States cuisine. They came out quickly, doused in the promised spicy chocolate sauce and yes….topped with another sauce (sauce on sauce is Amercian food porn at its best). The taste was quite acceptable and manged to marry the two southern flavours quite effectively. My only issue was the heavy breading on the wings. Perhaps it’s a dedication to American art of deep frying everything, but I would have prefered the naked wing approach, especially with the rich flavour of the abundant sauce. My plasma might have been a little happier with me without the breading as well.
Tex-Mex Mole Wings $12
I was feeling a little guilty so decided to try and balance things out with a little dose of a vegetable. Asparagus was in season, so I got an order. Surprise… it was served with cheese and mushroom gravy. I can’t complain about the taste or the cook on the asparagus..both were terrific but my guilt was hardly stifled as the nutritional value of the green spears was negated by the other ingredients. The portion size, however, was not American because there was no way I could feed 4 people with this serving of “veggies”.
Asparagus with cheese and gravy $7
I passed on dessert even though two of my biggest vices were being offered; ice cream sandwiches and funnel cakes. I also passed on a very intriguing cobb salad served with a whole egg served in a half avocado, a concept I have since adopted into my homemade Cobb.
My Take
Despite horror stories I had heard about the service being similar to the treatment of a gay couple at a misguided and ignorant Rick Perry rally, I found the service prompt and friendly. The atmosphere was fun and vibrant and I loved the open kitchen concept. Given the shitty beer selection and the pledge of allegiance to cheese and gravy, I’m still trying to figure out if the owners intend HOTB to be an reasonable facsimile of the American eatery or a parody of the plated gluttony which plagues our neighbours to the south. If it’s the latter I think it’s a brilliant joke. If it’s the former, it’s a stereotype worse than Canadians living in igloos. I mean, not everybody in American puts added fat on everything, right? Sure, a rib-sucking Texan may cherish the menu but I’m sure a clean eating Californian would cringe at the fact that this place even manages to make asparagus unhealthy. In the end, Home of the Brave is a fun rendition of American food. I wouldn’t, however, bring your vegan sister, a skinny first date or your dad if he’s on a statin. I would, however, bring a good old Ontario health card just in case. I don’t think Obamacare is ready for this place.
After a trip to the Vancouver aquarium as part of a team building activity (even though only three of us went), we went to look for a quick bite knowing the evening fare at the meeting would be less than appealing. It was an abnormally warm May day, so we wanted a patio,a drink and some decent food.
Coast is part of the Glowbal group conglomerate which owns a number of popular Vancouver restaurants. Having previously dined at Black + Blue and the Fish Shack with reasonable success, it sounds like a good idea, especially with the advertised cocktail menu and half price appetizers. After making the uphill trek to Alberni Street, we were able to secure a table on the front patio. The three of us were wearing casual team-building clothes (ie. yoga pants and shorts). We were hardly dressed for the occasion, especially in the midst of the attire of the waitstaff and numerous suits coming in but we were quickly comfortable in our outdoor seats.
Both my colleagues have what I consider excellent palates and both do not consume gluten. One of them has also never tried nigiri, so we took the opportunity to run an experiment with the small list on the menu. My thought was to hit her with the ebi thinking it would best to start her off with something cooked not to mention the fact that there was no guilt based on the fact we were just at the aquarium watching numerous other species splash around. The waitress, however, insisted that we opt for the unagi (since it was cooked) although I thought eel may not be the best way to initiate a novice sushi eater. The shrimp arrived without issue but the eel arrived coated in what appeared to be a brown sauce. Even as a gluten glutton, I have become aware that any brown sauce is an alarm bell, especially on a piece of sushi. It usually means soy sauce which means gluten. Keep in mind the menu clearly stated this item was gluten free but after deliberation by the waitstaff and kitchen slightly longer than the OJ Simpson verdict, we were told it in fact contained gluten. Big mistake. In the end, I ate the eel (which was decent but expensive) and I succeeded in introducing her to the world of nigiri albeit a tame piece of cooked shrimp.
Shrimp and Eel Nigiri ($3.95 and $5.30 respectively). Note the brown sauce…
I will give Coast credit for it’s buck a shuck special. I indulged in a half dozen oysters, portraying behaviour similar to that of a five year old opening a new set of lego. I become mesmerized by combining oyster flesh with pungent horseradish and some type of mignonette. In fact, I don’t think anything gives me as much enjoyment in the area of seafood relations since Mr. Tecklenberg showed me how to hypnotize a lobster when I was 8 or 9 at a table in his namesake Sudbury restaurant. I was so giddy I forgot the picture.
Each of us weren’t up for a whole lot of food (beside the after effect of seeing a whole lot of underwater life), but we each ordered a dish and did a family style sorta thing. First were the thai mussels (minus the bread). They were tasty but a rather dismal serving for $19. Maybe it would have come with 17 pieces of garlic bread which would have made it a bit more economical.
Thai Mussels (18.95 or about a buck each..I’d rather have the oysters)
Second was the grilled halibut. It made a lot of sense given the fact it was the season and there was not a hint of brown sauce anywhere on the plate. Instead, it was served with a decent potato salad. The fish was cooked nicely but it’s difficult to justify the $38 price tag.
Grilled Halibut ($37.95)
Finally, my choice was the apple chopped salad ($12.95) with the optional upgrade of two scallops for a whopping ten bucks. It arrived with a lone scallop and I made a note to see if it was reflected properly on the bill. I never had the chance. The salad itself was fresh, crisp and nicely balanced but when I cut open the scallop I looked at my colleagues and in my best Gordon Ramsey accent yelled “The f@*%ing scallop is raw”. In fact, it was a bit of a relief because paying 5 bucks for a scallop the size of a jawbreaker just wasn’t worth it. Perhaps the biggest annoyance of all was when the manager returned with the plate to confirm with me that, after careful deliberation with the chef, the scallop was in fact raw and they would gladly take it off the bill. I guess all those years of watching Hell’s kitchen finally paid off since it saved me the embarrassment of being corrected in front of my esteemed colleagues.
Apple Chopped Salad ($12.95) with a $5 scallop
The source of much deliberation….
My Take
Vancouver’s Glowbal group seems to be like olives, cilantro or goat cheese; you either love them or hate them. Some see the group as an innovative and eclectic collection of restaurants showcasing an incredible arrays of foods. Others see it as an overpriced series of misguided trends in which the decor is more important than the food. The inability to properly display gluten-free foods combined with minute mussels and an undercooked and underwhelming five dollar scallop (that included a second opinion on doneness) makes me lean toward the latter. This was just a bad experience with no effort made to fix it. Good thing there were crudites back at the meeting. I swear a carrot stick never tasted so good.
Sometimes when I’m out of town I put a day’s worth of effort into carefully orchestrating a dining schedule. A combination of urbanspoon, yelp, the opinion of other bloggers and sometimes Guy Fieri drive my decisions, especially when time is a factor. Other times, however, I take a walk and see what meets my fancy. I was staying at the Westin Bayshore in Vancouver and decided to take a walk down Robson with a colleague to see what I could devour on a break between my meeting and the planned rubber chicken dinner later in the evening. This part of Robson is dotted with a number of Asian eateries including Korean, Vietnamese, Malaysian and Japanese. Based on the cozy decor and gluten-free choices (NB-not me), we sat down at Ap Ju Jung. Despite the fact it was early in the evening. it was already half full. On top of that, I was the only Caucasian in the house so I was confident in this random pick.
After ordering, we were treated to a bowl of sweet potato soup which had a thin but smooth texture and a nice glisten. It tasted a bit like baby food (although not unpleasant) and erred on the side of sweet and was in stark contrast to the spicy dishes to come.
Sweet Potato Soup
Next, we were both offered a tray of banchan which consisted of seaweed salad, kimchi and what I believe was a sweet boiled potato. Whether it was our peckish nature or the deliciousness of the dishes, we devoured all three with relative ease (in fact my dinner date is well known for destroying a plate calamari on a good day so we can add seaweed salad to the list). This resulted in a second round of banchan which I found odd since everybody else around us shared one and didn’t get a second let alone a third. Perhaps they sensed our grateful gluttony.
Banden- Seaweed Salad, Potatoes and Kimchi
Shortly after, my homemade dumplings arrived dim su. The dumpling itself was quite delicate and was stuffed with a tasty pork and chive mixture. It was a great balance between dough and filling The coarse filling had a great texture and wasn’t dry or watery. I had no problem putting the quartet away.
Homemade Dumplings $7.95
I also ordered kimchi stew with tuna. I can’t complain about the lack of authenticity but it was a humble reminder that kimchi can be overwhelming when it’s the mainstay of the dish. Sour and spicy along with the odd bit of sweet tuna collided on the tongue resulting a pleasant train wreck of flavours. Due to the intensity of the kimchi, it was difficult to finish the whole bowl.
Tuna Kimchi Stew $9.95
Not surprisingly, the calamari queen (isn’t that a Billy Ocean song) ordered spicy squid with rice. The first bite of squid I had was tough and rubbery but it must have been an anomaly because the rest was spot on. There was good balance between protein and vegetable (mainly green beans and onions which both kept their crunch) and the spiciness was aggressive but within the spectrum of a wandering Caucasian.
Spicy Squid and Rice $9.95
My Take
With the multitude of restaurants in Vancouver, it is easy to over think each and every dining possibility. Sometimes I enjoy exploring neighbourhoods just to hit a random place along the way. This was the case with Ap Gu Jung. Offering an array of Korean cuisine in a clean and cozy environment, the food and service were quite good. The gifts of soup and banchan were delicious and most appreciated. The price points of the other dishes were quite acceptable. Since we were there early, I can’t comment on the night scene ( I noticed a set of drums on the second floor overlooking the main area), but at 530 pm you could have a conversation even with the funky music playing in the background. In the end, Ap Gu Jung’s gracious experience was much more Ban Ki-moon than Kim Jong-un.
The Farmer’s apprentice has burst on the seen in Vancouver with the same intensity that Donald Trump’s apprentice hit the airwaves years ago . Trump’s show tested young and aspiring entrepreneurs on a variety of tasks and had sent their asses out the door if they didn’t make the cut. I can make the same parallels with this restaurant…let me explain.
The first task is getting a reservation. The small venue’s popularity makes it difficult to get into. I placed a call between their designated hours of 2 pm to 5pm only to get a voice mail asking me to leave my name, party size along with date and time and somebody would get back to me IF a reservation was available. Knowing my time in Vancouver was short, I let them know I would be free anytime Thursday night. I received a call shortly after confirming an 830 reservation.
The second task was finding the place. Perhaps it’s a bit easier on a night that didn’t include a confused cab driver and a heavy rainstorm in the dark, but I imagine it’s still a difficult task on a good night. It’s small and subtle exterior along West 6th street doesn’t stand out.
Task three was getting a seat. The host had the typical “please tell me you don’t have a reservation so I can laugh at you” look. He looked a bit disappointed when I announced my 830 slot but still seemed a bit pleased when he told me I would have to wait a few minutes. Looking around, the place is small and looked like a farmhouse an ambitious hipster got his or her hands all over. There were tiny tables, rural country window panes and a washroom separated by barn doors. The set-up was messy, especially at the door. It was quite crowded, especially with the need for waitstaff to run out to the porch on occasion to serve the tables out there. A large bar/communal table takes up a good part of the middle of the restaurant. As I waited, I always felt like I was in the way. Eventually, we were seated at table in the front corner which was rather quaint.
The fourth task was ordering. This feat was hampered by the fact that the online menu is updated periodically and may not be reflective of the evening’s fare. For example, I had my heart set on the leeks, cat tails, caramelized buttermilk, ramps, watercress (I have childhood memories of eating boiled cat tails which may have triggered my desire for things that grow in a swamp). The menu changed, however, so I was out of luck unless I wanted my cat tail served beside roasted chicken. For about 5 seconds I pondered asking if I could just have a side order but visions of the soup nazi filled my head and figured there was a slight chance I might be asked to leave.
I started with a drink. Since having my first one in Toronto a couple of months ago, I have developed an affinity for the classic boulevadier. This one was decent for $10 but I still crave the one from east thrity-six in Toronto on a regular basis.
Boulevadier $10
Foodwise, I settled for poached egg, first season asparagus, rye bread, mimolette, pea shoots for $11. The egg seemed almost sous vide and had a vibrant orange yolk and with the asparagus was hidden beneath a foam and topped with the grated salty cheese and rye bread crumbs.The taste hit the mark although some some slides of ry would have been nice to mop of the aftermath of my yolk piercing destruction.
Asparagus with poached egg $11
Next was mackerel, lovage, sea asparagus, celery and ikura. The presentation was beautiful. The mackerel skin was charred and the remaining ingredients were served salsa style on top of the filet which cut through the fatty fish with easy. The marriage of crunchy vegetables and silky fish made for great mouth feel and pings of salt from the ikura bounced around my palate to consummate the seasoning.
Mackerel $12
Finally, I had the 3 weeks dry aged quail, honey roasted carrot, orange, pistachio and cabarnet sauvignon vinegar($18). One again, it was a pretty dish; presented with different colours and textures. The hay-stuffed quail was nicely roasted with the breasts served medium-rare. I was encouraged by the waitstaff to rummage through the hay in hopes of finding an “oyster”. I don’t think I discovered a gem but part of it had to do with the fact I got little enjoyment from digging through mushy, cooked hay. The carrots served two ways (roasted and pureed) were delicious. The vinegar was deep and rich in colour and added some needed acid. The oranges were irrelevant from both a taste and presentation perspective.
Quail $18
For dessert, I opted for sesame ice cream. The ice cream was overpowered by odd taste of the sesame wafer. Perhaps I was spoiled by the artistry of the previous dishes because I was a little let down by the bland presentation of the dessert. Hell, a ground cherry/gooseberry (although not the season) would have been a colourful and tasty addition to the otherwise boring plate.
Sesame Ice Cream $7
My Take
The Farmer’s apprentice has blasted up the charts and is cited as one of the best new restaurants in the country for it’s veggiephilic menu which focuses on fresh, local flavours. The food is creative, intelligent and unpredictable. The dessert wasn’t. Many other reviews state that the food makes up for any issues around service, the cryptic reservation policy or sitting within the cramped quarters of a rundown rural oasis within a bustling west coast urban centre. I disagree.
Much like the show with the same name, you enter the unknown and get exposed to trials and tribulations of trying to guess the way the ingredients will co-exist based on the loose description or the kinder egg philosophy of searching through soggy hay for a chance at an “oyster”. Like the apprentice, the fun and funky gamesmanship is overshadowed by the feeling of being judged. After all, you should feel privileged to be drinking from a enamel cup and opening a barn door to go to the washroom within one of Canada’s most touted restaurants. I couldn’t help but feel that with one wrong move or failed mission and the waitstaff would point in my direction and say “you’re fired” before sending me home in a waiting, yellow taxi.
Fare..Eat..Ales 